


Where Magic Exists

by 21CrumbledShadows12



Series: The Unexpected [2]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Angst, Arguments, Board Games, Bonding, Card Games, Disney, F/M, Family, Fluff, Fun, Haunting, In Love, King - Freeform, Kinky, Marriage, Masturbation, Next Installment is in Season 7, No rights to Disney Characters mentioned and the Walking Dead characters used, Princess - Freeform, Public Sex, Queen - Freeform, Sex, Sex Games, Sexual Content, Shower Sex, Wives, its a surprise, other then who you don't know, pre-season 7, prince - Freeform, smut smut smut
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-16
Updated: 2017-06-01
Packaged: 2018-09-17 23:04:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 41,678
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9350177
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/21CrumbledShadows12/pseuds/21CrumbledShadows12
Summary: What does boredom lead too? What of routine? Simply things had gone back to the way they were. But one conversation seems to break it all down, crumbling to the ground without mercy."Where do you want to go?""I want to go to Disney world."





	1. Day One: Road Trip

**Author's Note:**

> So the reason i had ended the First Installment 'Your Ugly Face' was because it had ultimately ended with both Negan and the reader finding out what they wanted and what to do next. This leads into that relationship and builds on an idea that I have had for a long time. I hope you all enjoy it! Lots of Simon, Lots of Negan, Lots of Dwight.

  
A whole two months since the incident with Andy and Peter and the Junkies, who listened to you at every turn. At the Junk Yard you had managed to change things, you had made stricter rules, and better guidelines. The men followed them without question and many of them had come to expect your weekly visits. The scar on your face had said it all and the ones on your back more so, that you had been through a lot: your respect was deserved.

Your relationship with Negan had gone back to normal, with only a few minor differences. Like how both Negan and you would have Sleep Overs, like how he would always expect you to be at his side, like how he had searched near and far for the board game Risk. To classify your relationship with Negan as just a friendship would be blind, both Negan and you knew that it was more than that. He would make out with you while watching movies together, you had seen him naked various times, but neither of you had ever had sex with one another.

It was obvious that his wives were not pleased with Negan at all, they would complain to him that you weren't one of them and that you didn't deserve his attention. Negan would ignore it, he would ignore it in favor of holding you at his side on Sleep Over nights and cuddling with you in the morning. Yet Negan had never allowed himself to consume you fully, he had never discarded his harem of wives to keep you as his only one. The playful banter would continue as usual, but he never had ever called you a demeaning name ever again. The other Saviors who did would not be given any chances to apologize because Negan wasn't tolerating that anymore. Sometimes he would even let you use Lucille, yourself.

So things had been better for you at the Sanctuary and the routine slowly had started to come back into play. Business was business, friendship was always second to it. But that didn't mean that they had cancelled the game nights and the parties. With Vic gone it was different, but the four had managed to handle it just fine. One night of poker had led to a great amount of pressuring and change, the change in routine for the simple success of desire.

"If I could go anywhere in the fucking world it would be Italy." Fat Joe said it so randomly that the four other card players stopped to give him a look of confusion.

"Why Italy?" You asked, a bit amused as Negan rolled his eyes to your quick sip for the topic.

"The food and the women." You let out a snort, then Simon added.

"I would go to fucking New York. Imagine how much you could fucking do with the end of the world right in front of you." Simon seemed exhilarated to mention New York, but it was probably nothing more than an undead playground at this point.

"What about all of those zombies? And what can you do in New York that you can't do here?"

"How do you even know they are there?" Simon shrugged, he put his two cards face down and cocked his head at you. "What if something fucking happened and the city was cleared out or some shit?" He grinned with a show of teeth. "I still would want to fucking go, I have never had the opportunity to blow up lady liberty."

"I don't think anyone has you dipshit." Negan stated, continuing his turn with a low huff.

"What about you Negan? Where would you want to go?" Your inquiry sent the table into a stillness.

"I'm happy right fucking here in Virginia, thank you very much." You placed a hand over your mouth to giggle at his aggravation then you glanced over at Dwight, who was out of it.

"What about you?" You asked him, he swiveled his head to glance at you.

"Alaska."

"Holy Shit, Dwight! Now you fucking got my attention. All you shits were saying places that just weren't making sense." You crossed your arms and glared at Negan, he didn't notice until he was shuffling through the deck of cards. "What?" You shook your head, the works of beguilement rumbling up your lips.

"Nobody has asked me." One of Negan's eyebrows lifted, he sat up in his chair and stretched his hands out to crack his fingers. Once he was comfortable with his position, he turned to you, leaning against the table with a warm expression.

"Where do you want to go?"

"I want to go to Disney world." There was no response after you had said it. Instead you busied yourself with picking up the deck that Negan had shuffled to deal out the cards. When you finished you lifted your eyes to Negan, he was staring at you with an expression that you couldn't quite place. Simon was looking down at his cards, Fat Joe was looking at you, and Dwight just didn't give a fuck tonight.

"Disney World, buttercup? Why the fuck there?"

"I've never been." You sighed out, peering down at your cards and hoping that the conversation wouldn't go on.

"What part haven't you been? There's Epcot, Magic Kingdom, Animal-"

"None of them." You interrupted Simon, clearing your throat to lay down a card. Negan was still gazing at you, his hand hovering over his bearded lips.

"That just isn't going to fucking do, now is it?" He said, this caused everyone to turn their attention to him. Curious what he might have in mind from your glimpse of information.

"What do you mean? It's really not that big of-"

"A deal?" Negan waved his head from side to side. "You are fucking insane. Every one at this table, raise your hand if you have been to Disney World." You shrunk back into your chair when everyone had raised their hands, except for you. "You see now? It's a pretty big fucking deal."

"Look..." You sighed. "I have never gone because my parents didn't believe in stuff like that. They thought that I should focus most on my future."

"Yeah what a fucking future this is." Simon parlayed, his shoulder lifted as you gave him a look.

"I became a doctor. That's not easy."

"Completely understandable, sweet thing. But what if we could get you to Disney World?" Negan's expression of what you now could determine was brainstorming had disappeared and he was grinning.

"Oh Shit! Negan that is one good fucking idea!" Simon shouted, both grown men at the table rose up to give each other a high five. Simon sat down, while Negan continued standing with both hands on his hips.

"Dwighty boy won't want to go, he can be in charge while we are gone. It would be a fucking break for once. We can all take the RV."

"You guys aren't serious right? Imagine how much fuel that would fucking take, we don't have that much."

"We will find a way, right Simon?" Simon shot up from his seat again, all pumped up and enthusiastic.

"Fuck Yeah!"

"That's three states guys! That is ridiculous! Sit back down!" Negan pointed a finger at you, he licked his lips.

"This is my gift to you, buttercup. It will be so fucking fun!"

"What about me?" Fat Joe asked amongst the shouting and excitement, Simon was starting pace back and forth with long strides. Shit these men were really fucking into this idea and when they both wanted something, they would get it.

"You can come too, Fat Joe."

"And I'm staying behind." Dwight said plainly, it was in plain sight that he didn't want to go anywhere.

"Me too." You weren't going to go on a twelve hour trip to Disney World, which might not even be as amazing as it was before the end of the world.

"Oh no you fucking don't, buttercup. You are coming with Simon, Fat Joe, and me whether you like it or not." You groaned as Simon jumped a little, a wide smile on his lips.

"Fuck this is going to be fun! We can bring chips and beer on this fucking trip."

"It will be a fucking VACATION!" Negan boisterously let out the loudest laughter you had ever heard, Simon and him starting to throw out ideas for the trip.

"We will take the RV. Take turns driving."

"What about music? We'll need some fucking tunes on the road." Simon explained, both men began rubbing at their facial hair in deep thought.

"I think I have some real style Rock in my room. How does that sound?"

"Sounds fucking awesome man, let's do this!" They high five again, Negan picking up Lucille.

"Okay Fat Joe," He pointed Lucille at Fat Joe. "You will be in charge of getting a shit fuck ton of candy and drinks and chips." You raised your hand into the air as if you were in a school classroom.

"Yes, you. The beautiful hot mama with her hand up." You dropped your hand and snorted.

"We can't drink and drive, so whoever is driving has to be sober."

"What the fuck, sugar cube?!" Simon's eyebrows furrowed and he seemed a bit let down.

"If the driver is drunk we can get into an accident. There aren't any ambulances around here so that would be stupid as fuck." You communicated your answer in hopes of canceling the trip completely, this was the most idiotic thing Negan had ever come up with.

"The beautiful hot mama has a point. Two of us will stay sober in the beginning and take turns with the others as they sober up. I volunteer Myself and buttercup first." Your jaw dropped, this was not a good idea at all.

"This is completely bullshit! I don't want to go!" You protested, Negan snapped his finger at you.

"You are fucking going young lady, now I want you to go find a map. We'll need some routes." Negan flicked his finger over to Simon. "Simon, you go get the RV ready. We will be needing a fuck ton of gasoline so make sure we have enough to get there and back."

"Fuck yes! We are doing this!"

"Shit! I've never been so excited! Does anybody have anything they want in particular?" Fat Joe asked as he stood up from his chair and staggered over to the steps.

"Buttercup likes Swedish fish, get her something sweet."

"Don't forget Coffee, fat ass." Simon demanded, Fat Joe nodded his head as he went up the stairs.

"And Soda pop, see if you can find that shit." Negan employed.

"Oh! Oh! And um-" Simon started snapping his fingers with his eyes closed.

"And a cooler." Negan helped finish for him.

"That's fucking right a cooler!" The two high five again and you were wondering if it was ever going to end. The only Two that were un-ecstatic about this were Dwight and you, still both sitting at the table as the craziness ensued. When Fat Joe left to go get the items requested, along with even more food, Negan turned to the rest of you.

"I am going to go and get some leisurely activities for the ride there. I will bring a book for you, doll, and a board game." Both Simon and Negan started adding more to the list of necessities for the trip; Sleeping bags, mayonnaise, about Simon's girl coming along, condoms, porn mags, guns, pickle juice, a deck of cards, pillows, blankets-

"You guys are fucking crazy! Calm down a little bit!" You interrupted their rambling, the two paused to look at you with sour faces, like two kids who had gotten their dreams taken away. "How are we supposed to get all of this stuff? What if we run out of food?"

"We go find some." You rolled your eyes.

"This is so fucking unrealistic, it's not even a joke."

"Well what's the big deal?" Negan asked, you stood up with a grunt and angrily stomped over to the men.

"What if a tire pops-"

"Simon, add two tires to the list." Your teeth clenched and fists followed suit at your sides.

"What if one of us gets hurt?"

"You are a doctor, right?"

"What if I get hurt?"

"Oh baby," While made a feigned duck face, he held his arms open to you, waiting for you to hug him. Meanwhile Simon was holding his forefinger and thumb together to create the smallest violin in the world. You allowed Negan to hug you and jokingly pat your head as if you were a fear-stricken child. "I'm so sorry." He pulled away and then suddenly the facade was up. "I'm not going to let anything fucking happen to you, are you fucking crazy?!"

"What happens if we lose gas and we can't get back?! What if we get overran by walkers?!"

"Jesus fuck! Live a little! You are going to come with us whether you like it or not and Simon-" He turned to Simon as if the conversation had never happened. "Why don't you add a television that works? We can watch movies and shit!"

"Oh fuck, Negan! That's a great idea, my dude!" You sighed as Simone as dismissed, running along to go and get what he was instructed. Negan rubbed your shoulder, he kissed your forehead.

"Go find that map, baby doll. Then meet me back in my room. I will help you pack your stuff! We leave first thing tomorrow morning!" He hooted, as he disappeared out the door your stomachs dropped. You looked over your shoulder at Dwight, who was as calm as ever.

"What the fuck just happened?!" You exclaimed.

 


	2. Day Two: On the Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> On the Road, a lot goes on.

  
That morning was hell. Negan woke you up at the break of dawn, he kicked your butt as he got out of bed. After taking a shower, he found you still sleeping on your side of the bed, he came out and yanked at the covers violently until you grumbled a 'fuck you'. Then he used all of his strength to take them from you, followed by the pillows and then your socks. That was when you finally had decided to leave the bed, because the socks thing wasn't okay. You were pissed.

The Sanctuary was mostly asleep, so it was just you, Negan, Simon, Dwight, Fat Joe, Ashlynn, and a couple of the other Saviors that guarded the gates. The RV was well prepared, everything requested was inside it; the miniature television was hooked up, the cooler was full of drinks and snacks, sleeping bags, porn mags, basically everything that Negan and Simon had talked about. The luggage was shoved into the side of the RV, along with the ten containers of gasoline that would hopefully last the trip. You weren't too sure how a majority of these things were found, but somehow they were. Even Fat Joe had managed to get you your Swedish fish, something you had rarely ever had the opportunity to have.

Negan checked to make sure everything was in order before inviting everyone to gather around the front of the RV. Dwight went back inside because he truly didn't want to go and he other Saviors opened the gates.

"So here are the fucking rules," Negan began, "I am in charge of the music, no one fucking else is going to touch the radio other than buttercup and I." Negan gave a curt nod to you, you rolled your eyes with a hidden smirk. "No fucking smoking, I hate that shit, it causes cancer. And most importantly I don't want drama, okay? No fucking drama."

"Can we just start this already? Let's get on the fucking road." Simon stated smugly, his arm wrapped around Ashlynn's bronze shoulders. You liked Ashlynn, she was a good match for Simon. She wasn't very skinny, or fat, more so in between. Her build was taut with a tad bit a muscularity, she came up to his chin when standing fully. Her hair was a dark brown, short and choppy. Her eyes were hazel and her skin was like gold in the sunlight. She was about six years older than you and was a mechanic for the Sanctuary, the only female mechanic that was.

The five of you entered the RV, Negan and you sat in the front, Fat Joe sitting towards the back and Simon and Ashlynn sitting at the booth.

You opened the map on your lap as Negan started the RV, it ignited with a low rumble.  
"Okay, so tell me where too, buttercup?"

"Get onto I-X and keep going straight." Negan leaned over to your side, peering down at the map from your shoulder.

"Did you highlight like a said?"

"Of course, I fucking highlighted like you said." You didn't highlight. You gave his shoulder a playful tap, he grinned falling back into his seat before driving outside of the gates. It was extremely silent at first, you could feel Negan's patience wavering as his hands tightened around the wheel. It was finally broken when you decided to pull out the music CDs he had brought; Pink Floyd, AC/DC, Metallica, SlipKnot, the bands that he listened to the most. But then you caught sight of another CD hidden amongst the others, one so abstract from the rest, and you hid your approval as you slid it into the slot and hit play. The CD ran for a bit before the music started to play, there was a resounding groan throughout the RV, excluding both Negan and you.

_This magic moment, so different and so new/ Was like any other until I kissed you. And then it happened, it took me by surprise. I knew that you felt it too, by the look in your eyes_

"Didn't know you were a drifters fan, baby doll." Negan said over the music, you snorted and gave him a look that he couldn't see with his eyes on the road.

"I like Ben E. King, not-"

"I can't hear you doll. This is a really fucking magical moment." He joked, you let out a laugh. The entirety of the song was you lip-sinking and Negan tapping his hand against the wheel. The others in the back not so ecstatic for the song choice.

"How many more hours of this shit?" Fat Joe yelled from the back, you looked over the seat at him from afar.

"A while because we haven't even gotten to the Interstate yet." The next song choices ranged from Pink Floyd's 'the Wall' and AC/DC's 'Back in Black'. Eventually everybody grew sick of the radio so it was shut off in favor of talk and odd conversations were thrown around.

Like Hygiene...

"I haven't shaved in a long fucking time." Negan was looking in the mirror at his facial hair, rubbing a hand over it. "But I use to have a smooth ass baby face, I opted for a grumpy lumber jack."

"I don't really shave that often." You replied, Negan nodding because he already knew. "I mean, I take care of myself, I just don't want my leg hairs to grow back very thick."

"Yeah, I don't shave very much either." Ashlynn chimed in, Simon wiggles his eyebrows.

"Oh yeah, I am very aware of that and I don't mind at all." Simon caused the rest of the RV to toss around glances of disgust.

Or Sex...

"I don't know. It feels better when you make them cum first ya'know Simon?" Simon had switched places with you at the passenger seat, while Ashlynn and you sat from afar, listening to their conversation. "All warm and wet, that's what I like." From the corner of your eye, your disturbed expression is disrupted by Ashlynn's comment.

"Simon never gives me Oral and we do just fine. Best sex I'll ever have." You were so spooked by the entire thing that you had ended up playing Risk with Fat Joe and winning.

Or Disney itself...

"I can imagine that Animal Kingdom would be the worst place to go-"

"Fuck No, Blizzard Beach." Negan interrupted Simon. "That water hasn't been treated for years, I don't want to even know what it fucking smells like."

"Well what is the best?" You asked as you moved from your place to crouch down in between Simon and Negan.

"Magic Kingdom would have to be our main lot, I'm thinking." Negan said, Simon nodded his head in deep thought.

"I just fucking thought how we don't have to pay for any of this shit. We can bunk in the castle, Negan. For free."

"That sounds like so much fun." You crossed your legs and leaned up against the side of Negan's seat.

"All I know is that the princess and I have dibs on the fucking master suite." Negan's hand plopped down onto your head, where he massaged your scalp. You closed your eyes and let out a deep breath, that you needed to let go and just enjoy this trip.

Or Relationships...

"Are Negan and you together or something? You guys are so goddamned cute together." You blushed at Ashlynn's deduction, you shook your head.

"Not that I know of. We just are really good friends." You watched as Negan's head shot in your direction, your eyes meet for a split second before he looked back to the road.

"Really good friends that play tonsil hockey a lot and sleep in the same bed. Friends." Negan said, much to your surprise, his tone much less giddier than it had been before.

Then it was your turn to drive...

"Um... I haven't driven in a while, but I am sure I will be fine." Negan buckled up, something he hadn't done when he was driving. Fat Joe stumbled onto the RV as he zipped his pants up.

"Okay, so just, don't fuck anything up." He was talking to you like you were a teenager recently having learned how to drive a vehicle.

"Look Negan, I have a driver's license ya'know? I left it at my apartment when the world became fucked over, but I have one." You snapped, he snorted.

"I'm sure you fucking do, all I am saying is be... gentle with the bitch. Okay?"

"Yeah, whatever." Half way into your driving Negan kept grabbing your leg as you would turn or evade an object in the road. He would hold onto it for dear life, then let out a deep breath and straighten himself out. "If you don't trust me with the RV, then Simon can take over." Your expression was fierce, you were annoyed with his fear of you behind the wheel and mostly the expression he would keep making.

"No, no. Of course not babe, I trust you. It's just I don't know, you drive like a fucking concrete block."

"I am going the speed limit, mind you. And you weren't going so slow either."

"I was going at a reasonable speed, you just fucking jam your foot down in there." You did exactly as he said, the RV zooming forward down the road.

"Oh shit!" Fat Joe shouted as his beer spilled all over him. Negan was gripping onto everything, hunching back into his seat.

"Jesus fuck, doll! Slow the fuck down!"

"You are the one that said that I was going too fast before, is this the type of speed you were referring too?!" You slammed on the brakes and the RV came to a screeching halt, Fat joe flinging forward onto the floor. You gave off a wicked smile as you looked back at Negan's shocked expression.

"That kind of turned me on." You said, Negan's eyebrows shot up in response.

"Oh really?"

"Eye guys look." Simon came out from in between them and pointed ahead. Just down the road was a trashed gas station and you were starting to get hungry.

"Okay..." Negan adjusted his groin as he winked at you. "Bathroom break everybody, we will eat and then head back out." You drove up the gas station and parked in one of the parking spaces, Negan teasing you about how nobody parks property when it's the end of the world.

"Just shut up. Next time I can go faster if you want me to." Your threat was loose ended, because it was followed by:

"If you think I am ever going to let you behind that wheel again, you are fucking crazy. Simon can drive next."

 

 


	3. Day Two Continued: Swedish Fish

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan and you decide to explore, your relationship on its way to its peak. However, there are some walls that must be broken down brick by brick before they tumble.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Smut will be on its way soon and Disney world is approaching fast ;)

Simon and Ashlynn left the RV for some alone time, both Negan and you giving each other a look of amusement as they left.

"So that's why you brought the condoms?" You jested as you set up Risk, Negan taking the snacks and drinks out to prepare them on the table.

"I didn't bring them for Simon to have all the fun, I was expecting some action too." His expression was of fringed heartache, you snorted.

"Not gonna happen, big boy." He turned strict, his happiness shattered as soon as it had formed on those dimples of his.

"What do you mean?"

"You have five other women at home to please you. If you had wanted sex, you should have brought one of them." You stated it so matter factly, with such dispassion that you couldn't believe yourself. You were never one to be jealous, more heart broken than anything, but this was pure jealousy.

"Wait," You heard from the corner of the RV, you glanced over and found Fat Joe sitting in the corner staring at you with squinting eyes. "You didn't hear?"

"Hear, what?" You looked from him to Negan and back again. Negan's fists clenched on either side of the game board, his tongue rattling around in his mouth around his cheeks as he tried to come up with words.

"I thought that is why you brought her Negan."

"It is why I fucking brought her, now shut your big fucking mouth Fat boy!" Fat Joe flinched away, Negan scooting further into the booth to go off to his own mind. He placed a bag of Swedish fish and a beer in front of you, consciously choosing not to look up at you.

"Why did you bring me?" You asked in a solemn voice, lower and timid. He closed his eyes and shook his head, obvious irritation. "Was this trip planned?" You continued on a much broader topic.

"No, it wasn't. But it was meant as a gift to you, so stop fucking complaining." You didn't mention it again as you nibbled at your Swedish fish and sipped on your beer. You were halfway into the game of Risk when both Ashlynn and Simon came back.

"Thanks for the condoms, Negan. That was good thinking." Simon praised as he headed to the front of the RV, Ashlynn taking the passenger's seat.

"I am going to pee before we go." You muddled prior to standing up and chugging at the rest of your beer. Negan followed suit, he took the beer from your hands as you were drinking it and placed it down.

"Yeah I got to go too." Simon groaned as he threw his head back.

"Are you guys going to have sex now?" You looked over your shoulder at Negan and he shrugged as if the idea wasn't too far from him, it really wasn't anywhere away from him to be honest. He would totally fuck you.

"Not yet, maybe later Simon." You ignored the comment as you exited the RV and went on your way into the gas station. Negan followed after, you glared at him, entering through the broken glass door of the building. The aisles were empty and the floors were dirty for the most part. It was no lie that this place had been vacant for a long time. You found that Negan was following you still, you gave out a loud huff.

"Can you give me some space?" You snapped viciously, you came off far more annoyed than you expected. He grabbed your wrist and spun you around.

"I know you don't have to go to the bathroom, buttercup. I don't want you doing something stupid." You crossed your arms, looking anywhere but at him.

"I'm fine."

"Look, can't you just relax and enjoy this trip."

"I am."

"No." He grabbed your shoulders and shook you so that you would look at him. "You aren't." You blinked your eyes to hold back tears. You really didn't like this trip as much as you should have, there were multiple reasons for that: One, it only came to show how horrible it was not being Negan's only lover. Two, You had never been outside of the state of Virginia since you were born. And Three, you weren't even sure how the scale of a trip like this could be realistic in this world at the moment. All three things had brought out a green monster inside of you, you really only wanted to go back to your bed at the Sanctuary and sleep. Much like the ever growing signs of depression.

"I'm sorry, I don't know why I can't be happy about this trip." Lies.

"You should be, we are going to fucking Disney world, buttercup. That's where princesses belong." He tried as best as he could to cure your grouchy mood, you knew exactly what he was going to say next. "Are you bleeding? Is it that time of the month for me to steer clear?" He leaned down, his smile revealing a great deal of teeth. "I still haven't earned my red wings, you could be my first." His eyebrows wiggled suggestively, you turned away as a red blush coated your cheeks.

"No. I'm not on my period."

"Thank Jesus!" He exclaimed, he then pushed past you to make way for the bathroom. "You are such a bitch when you are on your period. Maybe we should try keeping it from coming one day." Your brain went into overload as he disappeared into the bathroom, steam visibly coming out of your head from your ears and nose.

_Did he just fucking suggest getting you pregnant?! But what about Sherry?! Wasn't he trying with her?! Why didn't he bring her along? Why not any of his wives?_

As Negan did his business, you had stood processing the entire statement. He exited the bathroom and waved a hand in front of his face.

"It smells in their doll. I would go for the RV toilet."

"That doesn't work and I can handle myself." You sniffed past him, he watched you as you entered the bathroom only to exit a moment later, pinching your nose.

"That toilet seat is a disaster."

"I fucking warned ya."

"Oh shut it! I never needed to go in the first place anyways." You pushed against his shoulder with a palm as he started hovering over you.

"What was that doll? I can't hear you, your beautiful body is making me all seeing, yet all deaf."

"Fuck you. Did you fucking hear that one?" He licked his lips before diving into your own, the both of you connecting satisfied smiles in a needy thirst for pleasure. The feelings that his lips could draw from you were far more marvelous than that of anything you had ever felt before. His tongue sifted through your lips to wrap around your own, his hands grasping your ass and squeezing roughly. You released a prolonged moan, wrapping your arms around his neck and weaving your fingers through his hair.

"Yeah, I think I heard you just fine doll. You said that you loved me so much that you would fuck me. How sweet?" His mockingly affectionate prose sent your heart to flutter because you knew that he truly meant it. You disregarded what he had said prior to entering the bathroom and you both continued back to the truck. However, his words still remained at the back of your mind, tossing and turning with everything else that was in there.

Negan and You sat next to one another in the booth, playing Risk as strategically as you could. You would win this game a majority of the time, sometimes Negan would get lucky and take over your forces without you truly noticing his assault before it had finished. Fat Joe watched from the side lines, until Negan had decided to watch a movie after he realized that you were just too good to beat this time around. One of the flicks that he brought having been a top favorite for the both of you, 'the Princess Bride'. You both bundled up together in the booth, Negan against the far back with his legs spread out on the seat as you sat between them. His Jacket was folded nicely over the seat of the booth beside Lucille, who was on the other side. Fat Joe having resorted to sitting on the floor in order to keep his skin intact from her kisses, he couldn't risk it. A blanket was draped over both Negan and you as you continued to watch the movie with great interest.

"Can I ask a question?" Fat Joe asked, Negan reaching forward over you to slap him on the head.

"Shut the fuck up, we are watching this you stupid fuck." He whispered in a hiss, Negan took a sip of his beer as he relaxed back into the seat again. You gently grasped at it from the bottom, drawing it from his lips to take a few sips yourself. Not once did either of you pull your eyes from the movie. No matter how many times you would watch it, it never seemed to bore you in the slightest.

When the movie was over it was Fat Joe's turn to take over the wheel. Simon and Ashlynn both saying that they felt a little sleepy. They would eventually sleep on one of the bunks at the center of the RV, leading into the mobile bedroom. The bedroom had been cleared out in favor of the various items that Negan had also listed with the other things they had brought on their trip.

By this point it was mid-day, the map had been looked at multiple times and within two hours everyone would be in North Carolina. So you rested back into Negan's chest with a deep breath, falling suit with the exhales and inhales of his lunges. You heard plastic crumbling on the table beside you and when you sleepily opened your eyes, Negan's hand was buried in your bag of Swedish Fish.

"I don't know how you eat these things, they are as tough as fucking rubber." He was a paradox to his very over words and thoughts and actions, the Swedish fish continuously being thrown into his mouth, he argued that he was being forced to eat them.

"Yeah, I use to have a bag every night when I was in college." You closed your eyes again and twisted onto your side over his chest, the scent of him overwhelming your senses. His arm wrapped around your shoulder and caressed at the bare skin beneath your sleeve.

"I am aware that we made a deal that we would never ask about the others past, but I honestly don't give two fucks, I want to know you." His words were sweet like honey, you knew this because Negan never really gave much care about anybody's past as long as they were living. His thirst for an enthralling conversation with you was most pleasing, so you humored him. A tight lipped smile formed on your lips as you buried deeper into his warm body.

"I use to have a German shepherd. His name was Tiki."

"How fucking interesting? I never had any animals before this shit storm." You felt the pressure of his chin as it was laid onto your scalp. "Continue."

"He liked Peanut Butter and long jogs in the morning. He was so darn cute."

"What happened to him?"

"He died a little before the apocalypse. It was hard for me because my mother and father had given him to me when I had graduated High School. They had both died in a car accident a little before my Junior year of college." His grip on your shoulder tightened just slightly, almost in a comforting and protective manner. "I went to the University of Virginia, specializing in the medical arts when I graduated."

"What made you want to be a doctor?" You took a deep breath, your hand clenching around the material of his white shirt.

"I had a little brother named Kevin, he died before he turned ten from Leukemia."

"Fuck doll, I'm-"

"Don't be." You snorted. "Anything is better than what we go through in this world. Even you had said so yourself, people like us don't have happy endings. We don't have fairytale witches and warlocks to wake us up after we die, we don't have a giant and a Spaniard sword fighter to go rescue us, and we most certainly don't have princes and princesses." Negan didn't say anything about your tiny rant, but only after you had kissed his bicep did he reply.

"Remember Lucille, how I told you that you reminded me of her?"

"Yeah." You cherished this, Negan never talked to you about his past unless he truly wanted to. You only knew bits and pieces.

"Well I had always wanted children, we could never have any. So one day we decided on adoption, her and me are looking through the long line of children, I was really thinking about having all of them, cutest angels ever really. We had never left with one."

"Why not? What happened?"

"Lucille looked at me and I swear I will never forget this for as long as I live, she said, 'I know this might sound selfish, but sometimes I just want you all to myself. I can't have that if we have kids, I can't have time for you'."

"Oh Negan," You adored Lucille, you had never known her but you loved her. She seemed so kind and understanding, she was very decisive from what you knew of her. "What did you say?"

"I didn't say anything because..." You lifted up slightly to look at his eyes, they were glistening. "I wasn't a good man back then doll. I am not a good man now." He had never showed such emotion towards you before, it really warmed you inside. You loved him with all of your being, so you laid back down on his chest and held him a little tighter.

"You're a great man, Negan. And great men don't have to be good, they just have to do great things."

"That doesn't bother you though in the slightest. I've killed about a hundred people, maybe more I don't keep fucking count." You tugged at the collar of his shirt.

"I still love you." You couldn't explain what it was like, loving a man that killed, but you were no different. "Even if the world isn't fair." Negan was silent for a few minutes, caressing you, but holding you as if you were about to disappear. He wouldn't be able to live without either.

"You know what, maybe sometimes we don't realize what good is in this world." His voice cracked and he cleared his throat, his voice was low and gravelly, so addicting. "We can choose to see what the worst is, or what we wish to make of it." He was throwing back at you the very same things you had said to him a couple months ago in confessing your feelings for him. "But I know for a fucking fact, doll. If our fate doesn't have a happy ending, then I sure as fuck am going to make us our own. And the first thing that will do that is this trip, I fucking promise." He nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck.

"I hope you can keep that promise, Negan."

"Oh fucking trust me, I intend to." You ended up falling asleep on Negan's chest, only to be woken up an hour later as the RV came to a screeching halt. You sat up and Negan did to, you scooted over to give him room to leave the booth.

"Stay Here." He went up to the front of the RV to check on Fat Joe. You had every intent of listening to Negan, but then you watched him walk back to grab Lucille.

"What's Wrong?" You asked, Simon and Ashlynn getting up out their bunk, wanting to know what was going on.

"There's a road block." Negan dismissively went back up to the front of the RV, grabbing his jacket and tossing it over his shoulder. You stood up, going up to the front of the RV to catch a look. It was a barricade of burnt up couches and mattresses.

Man made.

You were crossing territories.


	4. Day Three: Watched

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You are all not alone, being watched and possibly toyed with.

Negan was more than curious about the barricade on the road, however, instead of dwelling on it he had you all pull over to the side of the road to set up camp. Although it had been mid-day and all of you still had so far to go. You knew he was cautious as well, everyone was, we were all about six hours away from the Sanctuary. No one would be able to help us out here.

A fire had been made and beer and soda was passed around. Fat Joe took the first watch, Simon and Ash having decided to sleep in the RV rather than outside. Negan and you were both sitting by the fire, eventually laying out the sleeping bags side by side and going to bed. The next day when you woke up, it was of Negan's own doing, his body wrapped around your own and his harsh snoring in your ear. The sun was covered by dark clouds and the sky was a blue like grey. You had realized that Fat Joe was asleep also and that it was early morning and despite the safe status of the camp something was definitely off.

You left Negan's side to go take a piss, finding yourself at the side of the RV with nothing more than a piece of paper to substitute as toilet paper. Your hair was a mess and you were groggy, you hardly took notice that the cooler was missing. You told yourself that you should probably wake up Negan and Fat Joe, but really you had just wanted to go back to sleep. So you laid back down on your crumpled up sleeping bag and attempted a chance at a small cat nap, until you noticed in the distance a yellow plastic bag that had very well not been there before. You sat up a little, Negan grumbling something incoherent as he rolled over and grabbed your waist. You squinted at the bag, it was thin and small, extremely familiar. You leaned on your forearm as you lifted your torso up, Negan's hand slid down to your ass.

"What the fuck are you doing?" He growled lowly, his eyes still closed and the grip of his hand on your ass tightened. "Lay back down."

"Something's not right."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" His eyes creaked open into slits, he turned onto his back, releasing your butt. He wiped his face before sitting up with a groan, you stood up onto your feet and cautiously approached the yellow bag.

You crouched down as you picked it up, dusting off some of the dirt that had found its way onto it. Your eyes widened when you had recognized the bright red fish on the front, you would have sworn that you had had any Swedish fish since yesterday while watching 'the Princess Bride'. There were only three bags in there, Negan stepped up behind you and leaned his chin on your shoulder.

"What's that?"

"Someone had one of my Swedish Fish bags."

"You have to be fucking kidding me," Negan pulled away and began his pursuit to the sleeping Fat man. "Fat Ass! Wake up!" Fat Joe was rudely awakened by a slap to the head, waking up to nothing more than Negan's angry shouts. "You piece of shit, I can't believe you ate my girls snacks without her permission."

"No! No!" Fat Joe held his hands up in defense, shaking his head vigorously. "I haven't laid a hand on any of the snacks other than the chips."

"Yeah! You must fucking think I am an idiot, huh?" Meanwhile, your eyes were scanning over the surroundings of the RV. You knew it wasn't Fat Joe, he had already tried taking your Swedish fish before at the Sanctuary and you had reprimanded him for it. You dropped the bag on the ground as you caught sight of something in the distance, in the forest. It was...

"Negan." You breathlessly called out, he turned to face you, one of his hands gripping tightly onto Fat Joe's shirt.

"What is it?"

"Look." You pointed in the direction of the forest, where a little girl stood at its front. She was wearing a white torn up dress, it ended at her dirty knees. Her long blond hair was messy, but long and had ended at her waist. Not much could be seen of her due to her being so far away, but there was no doubt that she was a child. Negan came up beside you, furrowed eyebrows and an expression of confusion, caution, and disbelief.

"What the fuckity fuck is that?"

"It's a little girl." Fat Joe walked up to your other side, blood pouring out of his nose from Negan's forceful punishment.

"Is anyone else fucking seeing this?" Negan asked a bit skeptically, he thought he was going crazy, not that he wasn't.

"I am."

"M-Me too." Fat Joe stuttered out, you took a step forward about to approach the little girl. Negan's hand came out and snatched yours.

"If that little girl is still alive then there has to be a daddy somewhere and I would very much not like any conflict on this trip. Let's go."

"How do you know that she hasn't survived on her own?" You yanked your hand from his grasp and crossed your arms.

"She's a little girl, probably wasn't even old enough to walk when this shit started."

"I want to go see if she is okay."

"Don't you fucking-" You ignored Negan and continued back on your way towards the forest. She was still watching as you approached, about thirty seconds later Negan was barreling after you with Lucille in his hand. Fat Joe carrying his gun as he attempted to keep a speed fast enough to reach him, but eventually he started walking. Negan stopped alongside you, the both of you growing closer and closer to the girl. "This a bad idea, doll. It could be a trap."

"You will never know unless you try."

"It's not about knowing, it's just the likelihood. I mean what fucking eight or seven or whatever the fuck year old girl would be stranded in the middle of the forest?! With no one around?!"

"A lost one." You held a hand out against Negan's chest when you stopped walking, you were close enough that the girl was starting to back away. She had the bluest eyes you had ever seen in your entire life. You cleared your throat and managed a don't smile. "Hello."

She stared at you, in her hand grasped tightly was a handful of Swedish fish. Fat Joe arrived beside you, hunched over and panting for his life.

"Fat Joe, go back to the RV and get a bag of Swedish Fish." Fat Joe gave Negan a look of annoyance, but he kept silent and went walking back to the RV across the field.

"My name is (Y/N) and this is Negan." Negan's lips upturned into a friendly smile, he waved his open hand at her.

"Well aren't you just a little angel."

"What's your name?" Negan bit his bottom lip at your question, you moved one foot forward and the girl stepped away.

"We aren't going to hurt you?"

"You are adults..." Her tiny voice began, she shook her head. "We don't like adults." Negan's smile slowly fell at the use of the plural pronoun. Your eyes keened and your jaw tightened, you rose your gaze up to look at the empty forest.

"We?" Negan asked.

A unison of crys and shouts echoed through the forest as mountains of dirty and hardly clothed children came running towards Negan and you, the both of you darted. The quick leeches throwing sticks and rocks in your general direction.

"Fuck, Shit, Fuck, Cunt, Fuck, Fuck, Fuck!" Negan was running across the field with all of the speed he could muster, you were following closely behind. Just then Fat Joe was half way across the field with the Swedish Fish you had requested, only to start running back at the sight of the ravenous children. When you made it to the RV, Simon was exiting with a slash stomp on his step. He faced you guys as you ran towards him.

"Good Morn-"

"GET BACK IN THE FUCKING RV!" Negan yelled, Simon's eyes widened and he jumped back into the RV, then Negan and then you. You peeked your head out to find Fat Joe having trouble. His jogging pace slowing down and the children only becoming faster as they chased your steps.

"Hurry the fuck up, Joe!" Fat Joe was then tackled by at least five children at once, brought to the ground as they started to beat him up. The car's ignition stuttered and rumbled, not once turning on as Negan continued to flick the key. You slammed the RV door shut and fastened the latch, looking over your shoulder at Negan in the driver's seat. Ashlynn and Simon were standing to the side in consternation, when suddenly the RV started to receive hits.

"Negan! Get this piece of shit moving!" You put your back against the door, feeling the hard thumps against it as a stick was besting upon it.

"IM FUCKING SORRY, but last time I FUCKING checked I wasn't in children of the fucking corn!"

"What the fuck is going-" A rock was tossed through the window, glass shattering across the floor.

"JESUS Fuck!" Negan shouted, you closed your eyes and waited patiently for the madness to end. Three minutes later the obnoxious clicking and clanking, the thumping and beating against the truck had come to an end. You leaned away from the door to look ahead over the dashboard of the RV.

"What are they doing?" You hissed in a whisper from across the RV. Negan kept hidden behind the wheel as he scoped the front of the RV through the windshield.

"How the fuck should I know? I don't see anything?" A loud bang came from the other side of the RV door and everyone flinched in its direction.

"Open up Assholes! Or we will kill your friend!" Both Negan and you looked at one another, Simon shrugged and gave a snort.

"They are just kids." He stated as he reached for the latch in the door.

"Simon, No!" Negan and you hissed your disapproval in a low whisper, the thumping erupted again.

"We have a knife! We will do it!"

"When did my life become a fucking cluster fuck?" Negan stood up from his seat, he grabbed Lucille and made way for the door. He stopped in front of you, a dead silence came about and you unlatched the door.

"Together?" You offered and Negan nodded his head, he held his free hand out and you took it, resting your other on the door knob.

"Ten..." The kid had started to count, Negan shrugged.

"At least the kid knows how to count."

"Nine..."

"I love you, Negan." You didn't care to notice the crazed eyes that Negan gave you when you said that.

"Eight..." You took a deep breath before you opened the door and it swung open, revealing to you the sight of Fat Joe on his knees as the group of killer children surrounded him. They each adorned torn up clothing, some of the boys shirtless with vines draped across their chests, or pots on their heads. At the face of the circle was a young boy, about an inch under Negan's chin. He was wearing a brown tank top, his fluffy brown hair was long and thrown up in a messy bun. His eyes were a dark blue and his skin was pale, his lower half adorned a pair of beige board shorts and scraped up feet. In one hand he held a knife and in the other a clump of Fat Joe's hair.

"Exit." He demanded, Negan and you stepped out of the RV. The boy tilted his head to Simon and Ash inside. "Them too." They exited. You all stood in a line, being criticized by the new age of children in this day.

"Wow, I have never seen so many future fucking Serial Killers in my entire life." Negan swung Lucille up onto her shoulder, he nodded his head to one of the children.

"Why are you here?" The leader pointed the knife at Negan, Negan chuckled, but it knew it was a means to hide his fear. There was nothing that scared him more than a man eating group of children.

"We are going on a little trip. We are from the Sanctuary."

"Where is your leader?"

"You are looking at him, kid." Negan released your hand and tapped your shoulder. "This is the Queen, that there is my first mate and the lady next to him is his girl." Negan gestured Lucille as he labeled each one of us.

"What about this Fatty?" He kicked Fat Joe in the side and Fat Joe fell over with a grunt.

"He's my pawn." The kid regarded him for a moment before the knife was raised again.

"Well we don't want you here." He snarled and the other kids threw their fists up in the air and chanted in agreement.

"Now wait a second here." With a raise of his free hand, everyone silenced. "Where the fuck are your parents?"

"We don't have any. We are orphans." That familiar tiny voice answers through the crowd, which separated to allow her passage. The little girl from the forest, Negan frowned at her and sighed.

"That there is fucking sad."

"Go back Annie." The older boy demanded, Annie cowered away.

"Maybe we can come to a deal." You hadn't even realized what you were saying before the words canes rushing from your lips. The leader lifted his chin up with a scowl, he puffed his chest out and squinted at you.

"What deal could you adults make with us? You old freaks aren't any fun."

"You just fucking listen! We are fun as f-"

"We aren't just going on any road trip." You interrupted Negan's frustrated bout of  
words. "We are going to Disney World."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


	5. Day Three Continued: Children

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unexpected take alongs and arguments ensue.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for having not kept on my promise to publish a couple weeks ago, but my internet has been insanely down. And instead of throwing excuses out there for things I should be doing, I am just going to post another two chapters. I still have those one shots that I had a written a while back, like a way while back when I was bored, that I had never published, but I am sure they will show up eventually. 
> 
> Honestly I don't feel very confident about either of these chapters because it's not that I don't have the ideas and the format of the chapters in my head. I just have not had the time and it bothers me because you all are really interested in this story.
> 
> It is supposed to get so much better and I won't give a specific date, but more chapters will come.

"Are you fucking crazy?" Negan growled lowly, his grip fierce on your forearm. He had pulled you aside, a distance far enough to where the children couldn't hear, but still in their sights beside the RV.

"I'm sure they will say 'yes'."

"There is about thirty future serial killers here, we can't fit that many in the RV."

"Then we walk, the RV has been sabotaged by them anyway." Negan rolled his eyes and stomped his foot as he released to turn away and lean against the RV.

"I don't think I can live with thirty children for more than an hour, jesusfuck Buttercup." He glanced over his shoulder at you.

"I thought you use to be a gym teacher."

"That's different."

"How?" He grunted again and stomped his foot, he was still not having it. What a cute baby? Having his tantrum, let him have it.

"Well first of all if a kid was annoying the shit out of you, you couldn't just choke them to death."

"You aren't going to kill any children."

"Think about this, what do we do when we get there?! It could take a whole week to walk that distance, we don't even have enough fucking food. We have barely gotten that far from Virginia and we have all of our shit in the back of the RV!" He was furious, his eyes widening at you as he swung Lucille around and started to pace.

"Negan, they aren't going to let us go if we don't give them an offering." He stopped pacing, one hand on his hip as he looked out to the empty field. He began shaking his head, looking down and contemplating his choices.

"They are kids." He said with a sigh, breathless and exasperated. He gazed over at you, you shrugged.

"You have seen what they can do." You stepped up to stand beside him, crossing your arms and giving him a look of amusement. "We could always go back?"

"Fuck no." He didn't look at you, he was so angry and you knew that if he did he could easily forgive you for this. He didn't want to forgive you for this. He wanted it to just be him and you with the exception of a few others, not a whole bunch of fucking kids.

"Why does this trip matter so much? Why?"

"It's supposed to be a vacation. It's supposed to be a surprise." He mumbled, his gaze averting to the dirt ground.

"Negan, we can still have fun. We can leave these kids here and go back home." You slid your hand into his free one, his entire body went rigid. He looked over at you with a sigh, his eyes finally met yours; they grew softer, more somber, he investigated your features, your scar.

"We can't go back home yet."

"Why not?"

"Because." He closed his eyes and took a deep breath, you smiled softly behind his closed lids. You pressed closer to him, wrapping your arms around his neck and kissing him. When you pulled away his eyes fluttered open, that neat grin formatting his lips shortly after.

"Let's finish this then." You tugged him gently along by his hand back to the group of children. The leader boy standing strong with the knife still clasped in his hand.

"What is this you say about Disney World?" He asked in a deep voice, he keened his eyes and crossed his arms.

"We will take you all with us, when we get there you are free to go where you please. However, you do not disturb us and when we leave you are on your own." The group of children started to mutter and whisper amongst themselves.

"Enough!" The boy was contemplating the worst scenarios in his mind, you could visibly see the cogs turning. "We will go, but you have to give us all your weapons."

"That's not how it works, kid." Negan tucked Lucille onto his shoulder and licked his lips. "The adults are in charge." The boy did not seem to like that assertion so much, he grabbed the back of Joe's hair and yanked him down till his throat was accessible.

"Fuck, don't let him kill me." Fat Joe pleaded, Negan rolled his eyes before glancing at you for what you could only conceive as him gesturing for advice. You shrugged, not entirely sure that your answer would be up to Negan's par.

"How about this kid? We give you our weapons, but Lucille stays with me." The boy opened his mouth to reply, only to be interrupted by another adolescent.

"Hey Chiefton! We found another sucker!" A voice shouted from the other side of the RV, both Negan and you share a look of apprehension.

"Who the fuck could that be?" You whispered softly against his side, he shrugged.

"How the fuck should I know?" He hissed in reply, he was in no mood for any more surprises.

"Let me go!" Your answer was in the form of a familiar voice, followed by a familiar face as they were being pushed out towards the makeshift circle. You felt Negan tighten beside you, his fists clenched, his brows furrowed, his teeth gritted. His entire expression went from calm to full rage in seconds, you could see the cogs steaming from his ears. You wrapped an arm around his bicep to hold him back as Amber was brought forward. She looked far from the beautiful woman you had seen before you all had left. Her blonde hair was covered in dirty and scrambled, her skin was pale and crust was edging her blue eyes.

"What the fuck are you doing here, Amber?" Negan snarled, Amber was tossed onto her knees and the boy stepped forward.

"What more are you hiding from us?!" He lifted the knife and pointed it at you, you shook your head vigorously.

"We aren't hiding anything from you, not a fucking thing." The commotion only intensified as Negan took a giant step in front of you to distance the boy from you. The children stepped forward and jerked in unison with their weapons.

"Back the fuck off kid, or I will have to not be so lenient with you." The children went wild, but the boy remained unfazed.

"Search the RV." He ordered, Negan rolled his eyes as the surrounding kids rushed to the RV, pushing past Simon and Ash to get inside.

"Damn, kid. You aren't a very good negotiator are you?" Negan glared over his shoulder at a rattled and weak Amber, tears started to stream down her face. He knew they were fake, he would not go to comfort her even if they weren't.

"She was hiding in one of the compartments." A skinny and short boy with a pot on his head had said, he marched forward and stood at a crooked attention next to his leader, his chin held high and his boxers hardly hanging on his hips.

"Kid, how about we go talk like civilized leaders should?"

"Civilized leaders don't talk, they have war!" The boy shouted back with a raised fist in the air and the others cheered.

"No, what I am saying is. Don't you know about the secret fucking society of leaders." Your eyebrows caved in and you glanced over at Negan with a look of puzzlement. This kid was old enough to know that there was no society of leaders  and if there was he didn't seem like he was stupid enough to care. Yet this child seemed intrigued, as if he was younger than he appeared.

"Secret fucking society of leaders?" The boy shifted around, the knife still held up firmly. He shook his head and jabbed the knife in Negan's direction. "You are lying, there is no society."

"Of course there fucking is." Negan shrugged. "But you can't just go around talking about it."

"Why not?"

"Because it's a secret. Now how about we take this aside? You and Me, like some real leaders?" The boy was skeptical, he was contemplating his options. Meanwhile, the RV was being ransacked by toddlers and teenagers dressed in pots and pans and hardly anything else. Negan's eyes keened on the boy and he forced a friendly smile, the boy lowered his knife.

"Alright. Follow me." The kid started walking away, the crowd parted to let him pass. Negan winked at you as he followed after, you groaned.

"Don't do anything stupid, you old fart." Everyone was silence as both Negan and the child walked to the edge of the forest where they stopped. They started talking to one another, only about two minutes later did the sight become boring. Amber pushed herself up to her feet and dusted herself off, she stalked over to you. Fat Joe was still on his knees and Simon was holding Ashlynn in a comforting embrace. Amber sniffled and wiped a few tears away, her demeanor turned violent and she glared at you.

"What a whore you are? I mean honestly! He was ours first." You closed your eyes, not turning to her in favor of rubbing your temples.

"Can you just not, Amber? I don't give a fuck right now."

"And that right there is what makes you a slut." Your hands turned into fists at your sides and you shifted around to face her.

"He was the one that had wanted to take me on this trip."

"Yeah and in the mean time he had completely ditched us. He threw all of his wives away and guess what he said?" You didn't know that he had done that, new information pooling into your senses. "That he had found someone worth being with, what a load of bullshit? You don't look worth a goddamned second to me." _Why did he take you on this trip?_

"I-I didn't know. I-" Your blank expression turned into one of shock and before you know it, your mind was coming to terms with what she was saying before you even agreed.

"Didn't know?! You just fucking pressed yourself against my husband, you just fucking kissed him. What does that make you?" At first her voice had been somewhat muffled, but now it was loud enough for the children to hear. She was right, you knew there were other women and yet you still advanced on Negan as if it was just you and him.

"Please lower your-"

"What are you embarrassed?! Well how about this?! I'm pregnant!" Your jaw dropped, Simon's jaw dropped, Ashlynn's did, and Fat Joe just sat there like an ice cube. Inside you could feel your heart clench, your palms sweat, your consciousness cry, your face softened visibly. "Oh yeah pig face! Its Negan's." You should have seen this coming, Negan had previously mentioned trying to get one of his wives pregnant before but you had never taken him seriously.

"Y-You are-"

"Oh yeah, what you don't feel so fucking special anymore do you?" You crossed your arms and shook your head. Too far.

"I never felt special in the first place." You whispered, just loud enough so that only Amber could hear. You looked back into the clearing, Negan and the kid were laughing as if the entire confrontation before had hardly happened. You dropped to sit down, you crossed your legs and situated yourself in the dirt. You needed to think and you most importantly needed to get away from everybody. There was no where you could go, but as of right then and there you knew you wouldn't be able to look Negan in the face for a long time.

_Why did he bring you on this trip?_


	6. Day Four: Communication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Now that you know that Amber is preganant, you question the love that Negan and you share. You question if he loves you at all and soon you start to wonder if it would better if you just took yourself from the equation altogether.

When Negan had came back it was as if him and the child leader Derek, otherwise known as Chiefton, were best friends. The other children seemed just as puzzled as the adults, but a truce had been made and that was all that was important at that moment. Derek brought them to his camp; it use to be a summer camp for kids. Somehow their camp leaders had turned into a walkers, the children had to take drastic measures to defend themselves.

As far as the camp went it was small set of cabins, a lake beside them for bathing and drinking water. They had no running water and their sources of food were limited to what they could find in the forest. Some of them were Boy Scouts, quite skilled in the ways of hunting and fishing. To your surprise a group of thirty minors had developed their own Sanctuary, they had their own social statuses, their own jobs and hardly anyone fought unless it was of the playful sort. You loved children, you had always wanted a child, but you knew you would probably never have one. It was nice to see that the future was still possible, that no virus could overtake our humanity, our civilization.

Derek provided a cabin separately for just the adults, another one in case room was a problem. There were no mattresses, merely stinky blankets on the floor. The mattresses that had formed a barricade on the road were a result of the children's own doing in creating a border. Negan, you, Simon, and Ashlynn had shared one that night, while Joe had opted for staying outside of the second cabin, Derek had offered, due to Negan's threats: no one would be sharing a cabin with Amber. He had a long conversation with her about punishments and jealousy and a whole bunch of other things you couldn't really translate from your distance. There was no doubt in your mind, however, that Negan did not know about Amber's pregnant self and she was in no hurry to tell him. It would be her manipulation over you, her control. Regardless your heart still ached and your body was slightly numb, you didn't know what to say or do, or think. You ignored Negan that entire night, even when he had tried cuddling you on the wooden floor boards of the cabin. It did not go unnoticed to him.

The next morning the trip had continued, the children had packed their basic necessities. Everyone ready to migrate to the highly esteemed theme park. There was joking and laughter, conversations and arguments. Derek had stayed ahead of the band with Negan and the others. You had chosen to stay back a bit, the far back of the group, where Negan could hardly see you. Amber walked towards the front, every so often fumbling for Negan's attention. The bags and necessities were carried by the children, you had refused to allow any of them to carry your own bags. So your back was hurting from a large backpack and your arm was growing heavier every step you took with a vice grip on a carry on.

The woods were desolate of walkers, much for the luck of the large group moving rapidly in Disney World's direction. However, you could not share in anyone's delight. You wanted to go home, you wanted to embrace your pillow and fall into an endless sleep. Literally. It was difficult looking at Negan, at Amber, at the love that you could visibly see in Simon and Ashlynn's eyes. You missed Negan. It had only been a few hours since Amber had told you the news and had disgraced your status. You were a whore, the more you thought about it, the more you realized this and even more your depression and anxiety would deepen.

In the beginning you had thought that you weren't in love with Negan, but it turns out you were and he was in love with you. Or at least you had thought so. You felt a pull towards him, he who could put a smile of satisfaction and adoration on your face. There was no lie that you were hopelessly in love with Negan, but perhaps he was not hopelessly in love with you. You knew he was definitely not having this horrible feeling, a feeling you were very familiar with.

**_"Negan?" You had mustered up a lot of courage to ask him about this, to start this conversation. He turned his head from the tv and nodded at you._ **

**_"What's up, buttercup?" He smiled and caressed your cheek, you glanced down and fiddled nervously with your fingers._ **

**_"I love you, you know that?" His face remained impassive as a huge gulp of air dropped from his lunges through his nostrils._ **

**_"If this has to do with-"_ **

**_"I just..." You couldn't hide how hurt and confused you were. One whole month and you had never been closer to anyone in your entire life as you had been to Negan. His eyes creased and he bit his bottom lip. "Never mind."_ **

**_"You are questioning our friendship?"_ **

**_"This isn't friendship. This is something more." You brought a hand up to his chest, over his heart. "I can't keep knowing that you are with several other women and doing this at the same time."_ **

**_"Why not? It's with benefits?"_ **

**_"I don't care about the benefits." Your sincerity seemed to throw Negan into bewilderment, you knew that face. When his forehead would wrinkle and his eyes would turn into crescent moons. His head would tilt slightly, not too noticeable, but you noticed it._ **

**_"Then what is it? What do you care about?"_ **

**_"I care about you. I care about being with you. I don't stay here and hang out with you because I want your attention. It's because I want to give you attention, it's because I love you so much that I can hardly stand myself anymore."_ **

**_"What are you saying?" You groaned, men were such idiots._ **

**_"I'm saying that-that-if I ever end up falling in love with someone else..." Do it you won't. "You can't do anything about it. You can't have me anymore like this." Negan didn't seem to understand that, he pursed his lips and shrugged._ **

**_"I haven't had you at all since the day we first met. Maybe that's why I like you so much." Your heart crumbled, it crackled and popped, you would never forget that feeling._ **

That was the same feeling that you had felt after finding out about Amber's pregannacy. You were a doctor, you loved children, you should be happy. But you loved Negan even more, you loved him so much that you would kill yourself for him right that moment. You would drop to your knees and die. He had that power over you, he had a lot of power over you. It scared you a little bit.

The sun was starting to fall and fires were made, the children sitting around them and feasting on the food that they had managed to bring. You had found yourself off to the side, away from everyone cast under the moon of loneliness. You were hungry, but did not feel the need to eat. You were tired, but did not feel the need to sleep. It wasn't long before some of the fires were out and the youngest of the children were sleeping in tangled branches, or sleeping bags and under ripped up tents.

A warm hand had engulfed your shoulder, so lost in your pain, you had not noticed the footsteps coming up behind you. You looked up over your shoulder, it was Negan.

"Hey doll, you've been acting weird lately. Are you okay? You cold?" You snapped your gaze away back out to the nothingness that was over thousands of trees in natural formation.

"No, I'm-" His leather jacket was swung over your shoulders and soon he was sitting on the log beside you.

"What's fucking wrong? Is it Amber? Because if it is I can fix it. Whatever it is, please, let me fix it." He was agitated and you were confused, you wanted to be alone. No matter how good his jacket smelled for some reason, you just wanted him to go.

"It's nothing like that. I just want to be left alone." Negan stood up with a grunt, he faced you with his hands on his hips.

"Look it here, I don't know what the fuck is up with you right now but if you aren't going to fucking tell me then you better fix it. I don't just waste almost all of my resources to cross three states and get to damn Disney world for anyone." You didn't respond, you merely stared at him. He crossed his arms and growled. "It must be Amber! What did she fucking say?!"

"I don't want to talk about it." You whispered, he gritted his teeth.

"I'm in charge of you, so you are going to tell me whether you like it or not." That just about threw you off a cliff, you stood up to your full height and flung the jacket off your shoulders, you shoved it into his chest.

"You want to know what is bothering me?! You? I'm going back to the Sanctuary, I am going to pack my things and I am going to leave." His eyebrows furrowed, but then his expression dropped to stoicism.

"Well at least you reacted and trust me baby, you aren't going anywhere." His face was incredulous, doing more to your ever growing silent rage.

"Who the fuck do you think I am Negan?" He spun around to start pacing.

"Oh not this again?!"

"I can't keep this up."

"I give you everything and you do this to me!" He wasn't listening, but everyone else was by then. Some of the children had even woken up.

"I love you, doesn't that mean anything to you?"

"It means a lot, but you don't need to fucking keep saying it." You shake your head, so furious that you were shaking at this point. You step forward towards Negan and pause his pacing.

"Who does it mean a lot too Negan? Who?" Negan glanced over at you, your entire body was lightened by the moon, by the anger. "Of course we spend a lot of time together, we kiss and hold hands and pretend that we love each other. But you don't love me. If you did you would say it back, because saying it let's me know that this isn't just a farce." He didn't interrupt, he just gazed down at you. Amber and the others approached, Simon leaned against a tree for cover, Ashlynn against him. Fights like this had happened many times before at the Sanctuary, but never this brutal. "It tells me that all of your other wives don't mean shit, that they never did. And maybe it's selfish, but I have always wanted you for myself. I have tried time and time again to say something, but it's so hard to be humble and ask for your heart at the same time. This isn't enough anymore, it isn't enough to hold over for the stronger feelings that I have for you." Negan gulped, his eyes shot to Amber and she cowered back. "You don't need me anymore. I'm going back as soon as tomorrow. Take Amber to Disney World, i'm sure the unborn child that you share with her will just love it." He stopped, your eyes widened as you slapped a hand over your mouth. Negan flashed his gaze to Amber, you wished you could see the color drain from his face, the fear in his eyes. You realized your mistake before you could fix it and gosh was it a bad one.

"Amber I am so-"

"God you are such a fucking whore!" She yelled at you, starting a destructive path back to her sleeping bag.

"A-Amber's pregnant? But that can't be mine." Negan's hands were balled up at his sides, you bit your bottom lip. "That is not my baby."

"It is." You felt that there would have been no other explanation, Negan loved to fuck his wives as often as possible, even when you were in the picture. It was so wrong. No matter how much you loved him. "I want to be left alone, I need some time to think." You plopped back down on the log, but not before grabbing Negan's jacket and wrapping yourself in it. Negan stomped towards you and bundled a fist up in the jacket, yanking it from your body as he pulled away.

"Well while you are fucking thinking, I am going to be doing some thinking too. Who is going to take your place when we fucking get back?!" He walked away towards his tent, the others dispersed as the commotion simmered down. You pulled your legs to your chest and began to sob silently into your knees. And this was why you didn't associate with Love. The moment you thought you had something and it was ripped from you. It was all a lie.

**_Staring down at a picture of Lucille and Negan, both young and happy, both wearing their wedding day decor. From behind you, you felt Negan's arms wrap around you. He dropped his chin onto your shoulder and one of his hands encased yours, the one holding the picture. He guided your hand up to place it back down on the nightstand._ **

**_"She is so beautiful and you look so happy." He kissed your neck with a hum._ **

**_"You make me happy now." He grumbled into your shoulder, you giggled and leaned back into him._ **

**_"Negan, don't be ridiculous. I am not the only doll you spend your time with." He grabbed your hips and spun you around, he breathlessly placed his forehead to yours._ **

**_"You could be. Can you Imagine it just being you?" You frowned at the seriousness that the conversation was taking._ **

**_"But what about-"_ **

**_"Not today, but soon. I promise with all my heart that one day, soon, you will be my one and only wife." You shook your head, cupping his cheek._ **

**_"I don't think I can trust you to make that promise."_ **

**_"But you trust me?" He didn't listen very well, but you loved him for it. You loved him for everything that he was. He was perfect, he was the man of your life._ **

**_"I do. Yes, I trust you."_ **

Thwack! Your body flung to the side from the force, an intense pain pulsating from the point of impact on your skull. Your vision blurred and your hand came up to press over the pain, blood rippled out into your hand.

"Fuck." Your eyes flickered and you could see a blotchy figure, but you could hear a familiar voice.

"He was never yours." Your vision blurred further and slowly you began to descend into darkness. Your mind was pushing to stay awake, but your body was fighting back and eventually you were limp. Limp against the earth, against the pain, with no escape or help.

 


	7. Day Five: Missing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan finds out that his princess is missing and everything must go on hold until he finds her again.

 

   Negan was pissed. Pissed beyond belief. He had all these plans for this great trip and every single one of them was falling apart. He had one piece of mind to apologize to you, he had a completely different one to cast you out and curse the heavens. In all honestly Negan hadn't seen her since that morning and he had been vigorously looking for her, vigorously hoping to find her in his sights again. He was slowly starting to think that perhaps she had left and he couldn't have that, no he just couldn't. Her things were gone, he looked around for them, he looked around for her. She left. Negan was too pained to even think about it, that she would stick to doing such a thing. That she wouldn't be there when he got back to the Sanctuary. It was a fear of his. He couldn't imagine the rest of his life without you, he didn't want to.

 

"Hey Simon, have you seen Buttercup around?"

 

"Last time I saw her was last night." Simon explained as he shoved some blankets into a bag. Ashlynn was next to him, shaking her head at Negan when he looked to her with the same question. "You haven't seen her around?" Negan shook his head, his jaw clenched and he shifted on his feet. "We can go looking for her if you are worried?"

 

"That would be unnecessary." A high pitched voice piped in, everyone looked over to find Amber standing there. She was leaning against a tree, her eyes narrowing on Negan. "She left. I saw her go last night." Negan glared at her, she had the audacity to sneak onto his RV and ruin everything. "She told me that she didn't love you anyways. That she just wanted-"

 

"Fucking Liar." Negan spat, "We are going to go get her."

 

"I-It's uh-" Fat Joe paused when he went to intervene, he gave Amber a glance and she the same to him, something that did not go unnoticed by Simon. "It's too late now. She left when the sun came up."

 

"I don't fucking believe you fuckers." Negan swung Lucille, his teeth searching for his bottom lip as she landed on his shoulder. "She would have said 'goodbye', she probably doesn't even know her way back."

 

"Who said she was going back?" Ashyln sighed heavily and crossed her arms. "She seemed really upset after everyone left her last night. She didn't move once so I decided to go to bed, I woke up a little earlier to go pee and she wasn't there." 

 

"So you think she fucking left?" Negan's glove squeaked against Lucille's handle as his grip tightened. "Just like that."

 

"Negan..." Amber held out her hand and hanging from her index finger were the silver beads of a necklace, a locket on the end in the shape of a heart. Negan stiffened, as that had been the very exact necklace that he had given you only a couple weeks before. It was your birthday and he had thrown a surprise party for you.

 

**_You were outside alone, sitting on a concrete step and gazing up at the stars. A couple groans and growls and grunts coming from the walkers only a few feet away near the fence. Negan had exited the factory floor to go looking for you, only to find you alone in the cold night air. He stepped up to stand beside you, hunching over and positioning himself to sit alongside your place. He looked up to the stars also, an array of beautiful sparkling dots and the crescent moon being the center of it all._ **

****

**_"Why aren't you at your party?" You snorted at his question and shook your head with a slight shrug._ **

****

**_"I don't see the point in celebrating aging anymore. One day-" You gulped, your smile fading, he sat up on his elbows. The step above being his support when he leaned over._ **

****

**_"One day, what?" You twisted your head in his direction and gave him a sorrowful glance, before looking up at the stars again._ **

****

**_"One day we won't be here anymore. Why would you want to count the years off until you get there? One day there won't be enough supplies to keep us alive, one day-"_ **

****

**_"One day we are going to die..." He interrupted her tear drawing performance, this was her fear talking, this was her humanity. "One day we all are going to die, but that sure as hell ain't going to be today, or tomorrow, or next fucking week. We will find a way, we will endure and fucking survive because that is what we do." You tilted your head softly and nodded in agreement. "And birthdays only tell us that we have lived another year, we celebrate them because they give us hope. They remind us that we have survived and maybe next year we will have survived a little fucking longer." You reached your hand across your lap to grab his, which was dangling off the edge of the cement stair up one. Your smooth fingers tentatively caressed across taut and rough skin. "I got you a little something." Negan wasn't looking at you anymore, he was looking straight ahead at nothing, his other hand reaching into the front pocket of his jeans._ **

****

**_"You didn't have too."_ **

****

**_"No, I am pretty sure that I did." He pulled out a silver necklace, a heart shaped pendent on the end of it. "It was Lucille's before she died. It protected me all these fucking years and I want to give it to you." Still not offering you a glance._ **

****

**_"Negan, I can't accept that." Your eyes widened and you went to move away, your hand leaving his, but he swiftly caught it._ **

****

**_"Take it doll, it will help me sleep at night."_ **

****

**_"I will be there with you, I can help you sleep that way." He grinned at your response, you didn't struggle from his grasp as he tugged you closer._ **

****

**_"No, I want you to have this. No one else, not a single soul on this earth aside from you will lay a hand on this. You promise me?" You held your other hand out shakily, eyes flickering with a new found desire. He was giving you all of himself in the form of this single object and perhaps one day you would physically have him, not several other women, just you._ **

****

**_"I promise that no one else will ever touch this, no one else will ever know about it. I promise." He lowered it slowly into your palm, your breath hitched and your bottom lip trembled. You took it away as quickly as possible and snapped forward to press your lips to his stubbled cheek, when you retreated back he was grinning wider. He finally looked at you before closing the distance between your lips, moving with them in a familiar dance. He drew away with closed eyes and a entranced expression, you opened yours and smiled at his response._ **

****

**_"I love you Negan. I know I probably say it too much but-"_ **

****

**_"I care about you. I probably say that too much to." His eyes flitted open and he brought a hand up to caress your scar as he examined your features._ **

****

**_"It's alright, I am happy th-that you care."_ **

****

  
**_"But I don't love, do I? I don't ever love." He then stood up and gave you one last glance before he started walking away, it wasn't long before you followed. The pendant held in your hand with a vice grip. No one could ever know about it and you knew exactly why. It was because he didn't want people to think you were one of his wives. In that moment you weren't sure how you felt about it, was it better that he respected you socially rather than romantically? You would never know anytime soon, but you would also never let someone touch that necklace_**.

 

Negan silently stared at the dangling piece of jewelry, Amber lifted her chin slightly.

 

"She gave it to me. Said that I deserved it more." _She wouldn't_ , Negan thought, _she fucking promised me_.

 

"That is impossible." He stomped forward with long, precise strides until he was within arms reach. He yanked the chain from Amber's slender fingers and held it in the center of his gloved hand, his thumb running across its slick shine. "She wouldn't."

 

"She would, I promise you that Negan. You honestly don't see the side of her that we all do."

 

"What fucking side?" Simon butted in with a very displeased look on his face, he placed his hands on his hips and scowled. "She is the sweetest thing on this earth. Like a fucking sister to me."

 

"Oh then a sister that you kiss and fuck on a daily basis." She lipped back, Negan's fingers enveloped the pendant and his gaze shot to Simon. 

 

"What?! I would never do such a fucking thing. She is like a sister, I fucking said that already. I don't know what the fuck you are doing, but something is up?!" Negan couldn't even humor the possibility that Simon and you were fucking behind his back. He could never think such a thing, so he glared back to Amber with a stoic expression.

 

"I agree with Simon, what the fuck happened to her, Amber?"

 

"She left Negan. How is that so hard to accept?!" Then came the crocodile tears, she held her hands over her face and began to sob. 

"I am pregnant with your child and you are more worried about that whore." Negan spun around and clipped Lucille against a tree.

 

"DO not fucking call her that!" He yelled at Amber, who by this point was keeping up a very keen waterfall of tears. "And that is not my fucking child."

 

"You fucked me didn't you? After you had that fight with her a couple weeks ago, you fucking came to me remember? It is your child, I am pregnant with your baby."

 

**_Negan slammed his hands down on the bed as you had pushed him away for the seventh time that month. It had only been a short while after the incident with Andy and his men, you were still having night terrors, still afraid of sexual activities._ **

****

**_"What the fuck?!" You cowered back and crossed your arms over your bare chest insecurely. He was breathing heavily, his chest heaving and his eyes dark and lustful as he propped himself up on elbow. "What the fuck is up wth you?"_ **

****

**_"Negan, I-I can't do this. I know it's you, but every time you touch me I think of him." Negan fell back lazily with a sigh._ **

****

**_"Well when can we have sex?"_ **

****

**_"If you want it so bad, go find it elsewhere. You obviously don't care to wait for me, wait until I am comfortable."_ **

****

**_"That's fucking bullshit and you know it, Buttercup. I can't keep making out with you like this, it makes me horny." You huffed and sat up from the bed, tears brimming your eyes._ **

****

**_"Fuck you, Negan. It's always about you, I don't want this relationship to be based off of sex."_ **

****

**_"All relationships fucking are doll, deal with it." You picked up your bra and shirt off of the floor, throwing them on with an uncomfortable expression, attempting to keep your pain at bay._ **

****

**_"That's not how relationships go. I haven't had very many, but I have learned from movies and even more so Peter that when a relationship is purely centered on sex it doesn't last long." Negan's face cringed and he jumped up from the bed._ **

****

**_"Fuck this, if you think I am ever going to put my dick in you with the shit you are spewing you have another thing coming."_ **

****

**_"I thought you cared about me." You whined, not in a needy or desperate manner, but a pained one._ **

****

**_"Of course I do, but that doesn't mean shit. Maybe you haven't thought about the fact that I am not ready for what you are asking from me, huh?" He thought he had you trapped, you had no choice but to answer so you did. You looked at him, glistening eyes and tears and pure pain._ **

****

**_"If that is what this..." You gestured to both him and yourself. "Will be, then I guess we shouldn't kiss one another anymore, that we shouldn't cuddle, and sleep together."_ **

****

**_"I fucking guess so. I have five wives that don't even expect that fucking chicken shit."_ **

****

**_"Then go ahead and fuck one of them, how about two for all I fucking care, because that's all you have. No love, or foundation, no sense of respect for yourself and them!" You screech at him, fists clenched at your sides. He snatched the handle on the door with a harsh slap._ **

****

**_"You are talking about fucking respect?! What do you fucking know about it?! Planes will fucking fly the day you fucking actually deserve some respect around here!" That was the last thing he had said before swinging the door open and exiting the room with a slam behind him._ **

 

Negan had gone to Amber after that, he remembered it barely, a drunken gaze brought on by booze and sex. He shook his head in rage at the pure idea that Amber could even be holding his child, that was recklessness on his part and sexual frustration... on his part. It shouldn't be Amber, it should be you and at that moment he still couldn't process what he was going to do next.

 

"Negan, if she is still moving we need to catch up to her. We need to find her." Simon said, he cared about you. The last thing he wanted was for you to get eaten by a horde of walkers, maybe even worse. 

 

"What good would that do? She is hours ahead." Amber sniffled, a profound argument through Negan's eyes. _How could they catch up to her if she had really left?_ Then suddenly Negan felt the urge to look up, he lifted his head and directly across from him about ten feet was that little girl. She was hiding partially behind a tree for cover, her white clothing as tattered and ripped as he had been the day before. He was trying to recollect her name as he crouched down and held a hand out to her.

 

"Uh... Annie, was it?" The little girl nodded. "Do you know what happened to my princess? We can't find her." Annie came out from behind the tree, she took a cautious step towards Negan. 

 

"I saw her last night, sir. She was not feeling well." Annie accepts Negan's hand and her fingers drift over the chain of necklace still in his gloved hand. Negan's eyes narrowed on Annie, she was frowning intensely, and her hand was shaking. She knew something.

 

"Yes, I know. I feel bad for that. A king must always take care of his queen, regardless of himself. Can you tell me where she went?"

 

"I know she didn't leave, but she was just gone."

 

"Just gone?" Annie nodded her head and Negan's eyes flashed to Amber.

 

"The princess, she disappeared after you had left. I couldn't see much, just that she had gone." Negan licked his lips, he looked over his shoulder at Simon expectantly, then back to Annie. "Derek can help, Derek knows how to track things."

 

"Negan, please don't worry about this. I don't want her to hurt you again." Amber said this calmly and collected, but Negan could visibly see the aggravation and he knew he was heading in the right direction. 

 

"Angel, why don't you go tell Derek about this? Ask him if he can help us. Tell him to come see me with his answer." Annie nodded her head before jogging off, Negan stood to his full height and glared at Amber. 

 

"We are going to go look for her and if she wants to leave then we will fucking let her go, but I don't think that is the fucking case."

 

"This is ridiculous, Negan." Amber snapped back and Negan closed the distance between himself and her.

 

"The reason she is gone is because of you."

 

"No. The reason she left was because she wasn't getting attention." Negan rose his head and snarled.

 

"We are going to go find her." 

 

   Annie returned with Derek at her side and several of his followers following behind. Negan had waited patiently in a relaxed position against a tree, Lucille still nervously swinging from side to side.

 

"Annie says that one of your people is missing. I can help you, but not without a strict promise that we are still going to Disney world." Negan gave off a forced smile, he could not deny that Derek was an extremely good leader for being such a young boy, but he wanted this kid to think like him and be an adult.

 

"I can't make any promises kid. We might just not have the resources." Derek glanced around at the other children, they were not esteemed by this news. "

 

"Then we cannot help you find her."

 

"But Derek they need our help." Annie's voice was so angelic and child like, there was no way her older brother could upset her. "They need your knowledge of the area, you are good with hunting, we could find her."

 

"I can't trust you adults, you always betray us." Negan stood up and prowled around the tree for a moment in deep thought.

 

"Kid, listen here..." He was serious with Derek, as if Derek was an adult. "I don't ask anyone for help and if I do it isn't very often. So you can imagine that it is really out of my fucking character to be coming to you in need of your assistance. I won't treat you like a fucking child, unless you want me to." Derek was considering him with narrowed eyes, Annie was tugging at his hand in hopes that he would agree.

 

"Alright, but don't forget your promise." Negan didn't care at this point, he just wanted you back.

 

"I am sure we will come up with something, but first let's go find my Buttercup." Then the group of children and adults alike began their search for you. They gathered their things and started to track back in the opposite direction. Negan was persistent, he had one directive and one alone. He would not let you go on your own, he wouldn't let you go without a fight and he sure as hell was going to go looking for one if it meant keeping you with him. 

 

He had big plans for you and him.

 

He had big plans for this trip.


	8. Day Six: Angel

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You are rescued by an unfamiliar face and brought to an extremely familiar place, but sorting out who to trust and how not to will be a challenge.

 

"Ugh... Fuck..." You couldn't help but grumble the strained curse and your body started to connect with your brain. One by one your limbs were alerting to soreness and your forehead was answering back with a jolting throb. Your fists clenched into plush covers and you shook your head back and forth above a fluffy pillow. You couldn't open your eyes, they were in pain, pain beyond belief.

 

"She's awake..." The voice was hazy and almost mute to your ears, you were struggling, struggling to place the voice. You couldn't imagine yourself being somewhere familiar, your body was covered in a dress and you could feel it. The fabric was scratchy and loose on your skin, strands of your hair brushed your nose. As you tilted your head to the side with a groan, you get the faint feeling of a bandage stretching over skin. "...get some water..."

 

"Is she going to be okay?"

 

"Of course, give her some time..." You bite your bottom lip and let out the first name that came to your mind.

 

"N-Negan?" You needed him; his hand, a kiss on the cheek, his arm wrapping around you, anything to let you know that he was their. You were given a hand, but not Negan's. It was much more softer in texture, gentle, it's grip wrapped around your weak one with a squeeze.

 

"It's alright." That wasn't Negan, you began to panic, part of your brain telling you to scream Negan's name, call for his help. You could not have a repeat of three months ago, your mental strength would diminish and everything you had been working at to heal it would fall apart. You forced your hand from the grip and your eyes fluttered open to blurry surroundings.

 

You had made out two figures, your eyes cleared slightly to allow the view of a room that was dimly lit, with the exception of a view stray rays breaking through the blinds. You were resting on a twin sized bed, the sheets covering you to your waist. At the foot of the bed stood one figure, who had clearly made out to be an extremely familiar face. 

 

"Dr. Carson?" You muttered under a groggy breath, he stepped around the bed to come closer, a tiny smile on his face.

 

"Hello, (Y/N). How are you feeling?" You snorted, but it hurt even to do that. You knew what this was, you barely remembered how it had happened, just barely.

 

"Concussion?"

 

"Yes, luckily not severe. But you will need to rest for a couple of days, there is an open wound." You nodded your head and as you shifted it over you saw the second figure on the other side of the bed. He had long brown hair and a thick beard and mustache, his eyes were a sapphire and his skin was a literally glowing.

 

"Am I in fucking heaven?" You asked a bit skeptically, your eyebrows furrowed and you winced as the wound on your forehead went with the movement. The man smiled with a slight chuckle, he shrugged.

 

"If that's where you want to be then, I guess you are."

 

"I'm at Hilltop though. Where's Negan?" You went to sit up and Carson placed a hand on your shoulder.

 

"You need to rest."

 

"What about Negan?" Carson glanced over at the other man, he shook his head.

 

"We didn't find you with him. You were alone."

 

"We were thinking that he had done this to you?" Rage bubbled up in your gut despite your condition, you pushed against Carson's hand and shoved it away.

 

"He would never do such a thing."

 

"Then who would?" Carson asked, you forced your brain to find out who it was that had done this to you. But you couldn't remember a thing from when it happened aside from the pain in your skull. If it was Negan he would have every reason to do such a thing, not only were you an obstacle between him and his preganant wife, but you were about to leave last time you saw him: You were property to him and he couldn't let you leave of your own accord.

 

"I don't think..."

 

"Negan betrayed you. I am sure of it, he left you alone after knocking you unconscious."

 

"That doesn't sound like him. He would take me with him."

 

"Where were you both going anyways?" Carson asked, he stood up and started to scavenge around the room for something, perhaps pain medication. 

 

"Disney World." The other man snorted, he placed his hands on his hips and turned around to pace.

 

"Who the fuck would go to Disney Wor-"

 

"Paul." Carson warned over his shoulder, he didn't have to say anything else and Jesus silenced. The Doctor walked back over to the cot and placed his hand over yours, he sighed. "I know how you feel about Negan, but there is no way we can evidently put him out of this. You have to be open to the possibility that it was him."

 

"But I don't think he would..." Your voice cracked and trailed off. 

 

"He might not have, but you can't say that he wouldn't." Your chin dropped to your chest and you gently laid back into the pillow.

 

"I don't understand you women, how could you be with a man like him?" Paul asked a bit randomly and immediately you assumed he was thinking you were a wife.

 

"I'm not one of his whores. I am just a really good friend." You thought for a moment on your next words, it was never easy to defend a man that murdered and plundered other groups. Ultimately everybody was trying to survive in this world, that was no excuse for the thing that Negan had done. You, however, knew that everyone had done something they shouldn't have to survive in this world and in that case you were just as bad as Negan. "He isn't all that bad, he does what he does to keep his people safe. He is a leader, I don't think anyone would expect less from him."

 

"I know leaders around here that don't do what Negan does to get by."

 

"And maybe that's why we haven't had any progress yet." Paul glared for a moment, then he looked away. You stared at the back of his head, curious about who he truly was. Carson held up a bottle of pills and smirked at you, drawing your attention away from Paul.

 

"I'm sure you know the drill already, Doctor." He teased, you couldn't help but shed a light smile.

 

"I sure do, Doc." You reached for the pills with shaky hands, but as soon as the idea started to come to your mind, your stomach shook with a sickness. Your body lurched over the side of the bed, the Doctor moved quick to shove a can in that direction and you spilled whatever contents were in your stomach.

 

"Shit, is she good?"

 

"This is expected, just try not to think too much. Relax."

 

"I can't, I just-I need to get back to the Sanctuary." He grabbed a towel and dabbed at the vomit on the side of your mouth, before cupping your cheek.

 

"Please, you need rest. You should know that pushing yourself can make it worse, it takes time."

 

"I am very aware of this Doctor. I just don't care, I need to get back to where I belong."

 

"We found you laying unconscious about thirty or so miles from here and you are fucking telling me you want to go back to the people who put you there?!"

 

"Negan didn't do it."

 

"He's right (Y/N). We could take you back, but you wouldn't know what you'd be walking into." You blankly gazed at Dr. Carson, a man you had known for a while, one that you trusted. If Dr. Carson thought it'd be best if you waited it out a little, then you would, but this Paul guy wanted you to abandon Negan completely. You weren't to let him control your decisions, you weren't going to let anyone do that.

 

"I will stay for a couple of days..." _Shit. Negan might not have even gotten back yet, if the trip was still on it would be weeks before he'd find you here._ "But then I go back to the Sanctuary."

 

"You lay back, I will go get some food." He chose not to respond to your declaration.

 

"Thank you Doctor." He turned away and left the room, leaving just Paul and you.

 

"People around here call me Jesus." He randomly spoke up amongst the silence, you nodded your head. The nickname seemed really familiar, but you couldn't place it.

 

"(Y/N)." You didn't want to talk to this man, you didn't really want to talk to anyone. You wanted to lay back and hope that the throbbing in your skull would stop.

 

"How do you and Dr.Carson know each other?"

 

"I am a Doctor."

 

"Oh... I see." It was quiet again, your lids slowly began to close. "Hey." They shot open and you looked to Jesus. "He told me to keep you awake if you woke up."

 

"I am a doctor and I am saying that I can close my eyes."

 

"You are quite stubborn."

 

"Leave me alone." You snapped a bit more viciously than you had intended, you rested your head back again and closed your eyes. You heard the creak of something alongside you and when you looked over, Jesus was sitting there with an amused smile. You narrowed your eyes on him, deciding to take in his overall attire. He was dressed in a loose white button up shirt and taut brown jeans, the sleeves of the shirt were rolled up and the pants were torn up and ripped.

 

"What the fuck is wrong with you?"

 

"Oh nothing, just curious is all." You sighed and went back to your previous state, you closed your eyes and took a deep breath. It took a split second before the name had left your lips, a name of hope.

 

"Dwight." You muttered under your breath, your eyes gradually peeled open as you sat up.

 

"What was that?" Jesus asked with squinted eyes and furrowed eyebrows.

 

"Dwight, Dwight is at the Sanctuary." 

 

"Wait, what?" You sucked in a gulp of air and swung the covers off of your body. "Now wait a second," Your legs followed suit over the side of the bed and you nudged yourself forward to get off the edge, legs stretching to the floor, dangling toes. "Doctor Carson said-"

 

"I know what the Doctor said you idiot." You jumped off of the cot and your bare feet finally touched the marble floor, you wobbled for a moment. Jesus circled the cot to get to you, he held your forearm firmly as you stood yourself up. "Now see, I am fine. I should know, okay?" Your eyes searched the room for anything that might be of your belongings, only to find that there was nothing more than medical supplies and blankets. "Clothes, where are my clothes?" Jesus dropped his head slightly, as if he were a puppy being scolded for his crimes. 

 

"We tossed them."

 

"You did what?!" Your mind started to panic even more when you realized that you were missing something very valuable to you. "Where did you put them?!" You ground out, taking a confident step forward only for your leg to give out. Jesus was there to catch you, you struggled furiously from his grasp.

 

"I told you we threw them away, they are in the dump. They were dirty-"

 

"You don't just fucking go around undressing people and throwing their shit away. Where are they?"

 

"Nowhere you can go." You slowly began to feel the risings of a panic attack, you began to hyperventilate. Negan's words going over and over in your mind, you were such an idiot to put it in your pocket. 

****

**_No one else, not a single soul on this earth aside from you will lay a hand on this._ **

****

"Are-Are you okay?" Jesus patted your back and tears came to your eyes. Carson came bursting through the door with a plate of food in his hands, which he immediately dropped at the scene before him. Jesus, with wide eyes, glanced at him in shock and shrugged. "She is freaking out."

 

"Where are my clothes?!" You shouted, Carson dropped the plate of food onto the nearest desk and sped over. He propped his arms under you and crouched down to your level, your eyes meeting with 

his. "I had something important, something-"

 

"I checked your clothes. There was nothing there!" Carson exclaimed to you, you took steady breathes to try and control yourself.

 

"There was a locket, N-Negan gave it to me."

 

"Maybe he took it back." Jesus offered, but only in a sarcastic manner. Little did he know that the cogs in your mind were starting to turn, that you were slowly starting to out things together. When you gathered yourself only a moment later, your heart thundering against your ribcage, you were staring at Carson.

 

"Can I-Can I get into something much more comfortable?"

 

"Of Course." Carson answered softly, he caressed your cheek for a moment with genuine care. "Jesus, take her back to the cot." Jesus walked you back over to the cot and helped you up onto it. You wrapped your arms around yourself and took a deep breath, you needed to clear your head and relax. You needed to do what Carson wanted you do, rest up and get better. But you couldn't help but wonder...

 

"Maybe Negan did do it." You stated in a broken voice, Carson turned around from the drawer he had been in. He was carrying a large t-shirt and grey sweats, probably two sizes bigger than you really needed.

 

"If you think so, I don't know, I can't tell you."

 

"He knocked me unconscious, thought he had killed me and then took back his locket. It would only make sense in that manner. No one knew that I had had that locket, but him."

 

"It could have always been a thief, from another group." Carson replied, his attention focused on the bandages at your temple as you held onto the clothes he rested on your lap.

 

"Don't be ridiculous. I can imagine Negan doing something as sadistic as that." Paul intervened, he was really getting on your nerves.

 

"Not to her." Carson sent back and you knew that maybe Carson was right, but maybe he wasn't. 

 

"We had an argument." You explained, Carson stood back with the remnants of a smile.

 

"Negan still wouldn't do it and I know from personal experience."

 

"I'm listening." Your voice was a lot more interested and awake, Carson propped himself up against the cot beside you.

 

"A couple months back when you jumped in front of that blade for Negan. He carried you to me, put a gun to my head and told me that if I didn't keep you alive he would kill me. Didn't bother me much, I know what a man will do when he is in love," Your ears perked up at the sound of the word, at the very utterance of it. "I used to have a wife, she was beautiful. I would do anything for her. Much like how Negan was willing to do anything for you that day. He stayed by your side the entire time, not once leaving it for food or water."

 

"When I told him it was okay for him to take you home, he held you the entire way there from what I had heard. I don't know what happened after that, but I can tell you this. Negan read a book aloud at your side, he took a nap beside you, he gazed at you. I know he would never do a thing to you that would put you in harms way, he would rather do everything for you. He would protect you and although I don't agree with the man, I can say that means a lot for someone like him."

 

"You can't be serious." You heard uttered in the background from Jesus, Carson shook his head. He stood up straight and waltzed to the door.

 

"Come on, Paul. Let her get some rest." The room was cleared out and you were left alone, with the nagging voice of a particular someone at the back of your head.

 

**_No one else, not a single soul on this earth aside from you will lay a hand on this._ **

****


	9. Day Seven: Pathes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan, still in search of you, begins to doubt how trustworthy you truly are and how loving you have been to him. Despite your absence, you have no means to truly defend yourself. The seed of doubt being planted in his brain at the command of a two-sided Amber.

    Negan had been looking for you for a whole day and that night he hadn't slept at all, too busy looking for any traces of you in the area they had made camp. He ignored Amber mostly, who had multiple times tried to persuade him from looking for you. However, there was no going back on this. When Derek had found where you had last been, Negan couldn't just let it sit there, he couldn't let the unknown bubble in his mind. Derek had found that you hadn't left on your own accord at all, that you had been dragged away like a heavy lump in one's throat. That piece of information only fueled Negan's desire to find you and save you. 

 

  He was skeptical about Amber, she had directly told him that she had seen you leave. Maybe you had and perhaps you were abducted then, but Negan wasn't having it. Simon was telling him not to underestimate Amber and Fat Joe was saying that there was no hope in finding you. He wasn't going to listen to anyone at this point, he was going to do everything he could to get you back. When the sun rose he woke everyone up and they continued their search, it was hours before Derek actually caught sight of something. It might have related to you and it might not have, Negan was willing to go with anything. The dragging marks in the dirt had stopped the day before, they were not far from where they had made camp. But this was miles away, there was a little to no chance that it had anything to do with you.

 

"Tire tracks," He pointed to the marks in the dirt path that cut the forest in half.

 

"That doesn't mean anything." Negan replied, he waved a hand and turned his gaze down to the long dirt road. The children were scattered around, looking for anything that might come to their attention as important. 

 

"They are fresh though, they haven't been warm. It could mean that there is settlement nearby."

 

"Or that maybe my men had decided to come back this way."

 

"Oh yeah," Simon began, he had an all time permanent frown on his lips. "That means we are going back towards the Sanctuary. We are back in Virginia again."

 

"Let's just continue the trip, Negan. We haven't had any progress at all." Amber complained, she shuffled closer to Negan and wrapped her arm around his bicep. He forcefully shoved her hands away and she sighed.

 

"This was not your fucking trip to begin with." Negan growled, he stomped closer to Derek.

 

"So what does this mean Kid?"

 

"It's past mid-day, I say we follow the tracks. See where they go, it could take us hours to get there but at least we would be going somewhere." Negan nodded, with Lucille hanging in the other hand he rose one hand up to itch at his scruff in though. Simon stepped up beside him as they stared out into the empty dirt trail that was in the direction of the tracks.

 

"You thinking what I am thinking?" Negan asked before glancing over to Simon, Simon nodded.

 

"Hilltop."

 

"We haven't found a body yet. And I am not going to stop until I find her, dead or alive." Simon licked his lips and took a deep breath. The reason Simon was Negan's second was because he told Negan how he felt without fear, he was a good confident to Negan.

 

"Negan maybe-" Simon was interrupted with Negan's pat on the shoulder. 

 

"If Hilltop took her and they know her, I believe they would take her back to the Sanctuary."

 

"So we should go back to the Sanctuary?" Simon's eyebrows furrowed and he leaned on his left foot.

 

"Let's check Hilltop first." Negan glanced over his shoulder at Derek. "Looks like we are following the tracks, kid." Derek nodded in agreement, he waved to the others and everyone followed after him as they went. Both Negan and Simon let them stay in the front, walking slowly behind to talk amongst one another.

 

"Negan, if she wants to leave then that is her decision." Negan's face wrinkled into pre disgust, he shuffled closer to Simon.

 

"I am not going to let that happen. She won't be safe out there."

 

"She was pretty fine before," Negan didn't answer, Amber suddenly waking at his other side. Ashlynn was following behind with Fat Joe. "She was really fine before actually. I have heard her tell me so many stor-"

 

"I don't give a fuck." He snarled, not once finding it in himself to look at Simon. It wasn't that Negan was angry with Simon, he knew Simon was right, but he didn't want him to be. He wanted you all to himself, for eternity, you were his alone. 

 

"Negan, we are doing this for no reason. I already told you how she felt." Negan's jaw clenched and his teeth gritted, he could hear the ringing in his ears from the amount of rage boiling in him. Was he really the only one that cared about you?

 

...

 

  
_Not Care. Love. Why was it so hard for him to say that to you before?_ He closed his eyes and steadied his breath.

 

"I don't care how Buttercup feels right now. She will tell it to my face." And as he walked he distantly peered down into the necklace, still clasped fiercely in his leather grip. "I want to hear it from her own lips."

 

The group treaded on down the road and as the sun started to fall they still had not made it to their destination. Negan wasn't so keen on leaving a bunch of kids in the wilderness to finish the trek to Hilltop, so he decided to stay with them instead. When the sun fell he had found a log to sit against and a view of some empty field to busy his time with. Eventually Simon, Ashlynn, and Fat Joe had gone to sleep, but Amber had come to occupy Negan's timeZ something he also wasn't so keen on in that moment.

 

She was quiet for a while, which was odd of her, she usually loved talking and annoying the fuck out of him.

 

"I miss you." She finally broke the silence as his eyelids had started to slide shut, his head growing heavy. He grumbled a curse under his breath and with a sigh, looked over at her with crescent eyes. "All the other wives miss you too, we want you to be over this phase of yours."

 

"Phase?"

 

"Yeah, you seem really obsessed with her." No matter how much shit Negan had dealt with lately from Amber, he was too exhausted to snap. Negan was a little obsessed with you, but he wasn't ashamed to admit that.

 

"It's no obsession." Screw that, he was ashamed, any man that has a weakness is ashamed of admitting it. "It's something you probably won't ever understand."

 

"If it's what I think you mean, then I do." She gazed up at the stars before scooting closer to him, he straightened himself out, waking up a bit and moving away.

 

"What do you fucking think I mean, Amber? If you had some other fuck to shove his dick in you, you never would have came on this trip."

 

"That's not true." Her voice raised slightly, before she caught herself and then met his gaze. "You are going to be a father, Negan."

 

"It's not my child, if anything, it is Mike'."

 

"Mike and I did some things, but he is nothing like you. I feel different with you." Negan hummed with disinterest, he situated Lucille between his legs and sat back.

 

"Back off Amber, I love (Y/N)." There it went and it was too late for him to take it back.

 

"You aren't getting it, she doesn't love you back. I know."

 

"Well I can't take your fucking word, you are a lying and sniveling little bitch." Negan closed his eyes again, it was quiet again and a satisfied smirk arose to his features.

 

"I bet you she doesn't satisfy you like I do..." Negan's eyebrows furrowed as he felt a tingling at his knee and when his eyes opened Amber, was laying there on her knees, rubbing her chin against it. He swung his leg over the log to straddle it, away from her altogether and then swatted at the empty air to get her away. Amber frowned, her paling resting on the wood up the log and she innocently looked up at Negan. "I have seen her with other men, I know she fucks other guys. We warned you about her, baby." Negan's head jolted in her direction, his lips pouted.

 

"You are just spilling more lies."

 

"No, Negan, a couple weeks ago she even tossed around the possibility of overthrowing you. Said that you were becoming too powerful and needed to be handled accordingly. Why else would she be so close to you?" Negan's head tiled downward in a pensive manner, he was thinking hard about that.

 

"She hardly ever left your side, it wasn't because she loved you but because she needed you to trust her."

 

"Simon, would have told me? I am not easily persuaded you fucking-"

 

"Simon knows already. Why is he so protective of her? They were fucking at one point I am telling you, real hard and rough fucking." Amber seemed so sincere and although Negan truly was a difficult man to sway, she was doing a good job at making him doubt. 

 

"I-I don't believe you." Negan's expression softened for a split moment before hardening into a stoic rage. "She would never do that."

 

"What about his shirt? Remember that time she was wearing his shirt? Or the time she was literally walking around in his underwear? Don't you remember?"

**_Negan had just gotten out of the shower when you had walked in. You were carrying a stack of papers, your glasses hanging off the edge of your nose. You placed the papers down on the coffee table and turned to face him. He was dripping wet; hair frizzed up on his head and glistening chest, traveling down into the towel where his manliness was most prominent. He grinned at you and have a suggestive wiggle of his eyebrows._ **

****

**_"Well, aren't you quite handsome today, Mister."_ **

****

**_"Actually replace the 'i' with an 'a' and then I might answer." You tiptoed over to him and, despite his nakedness, wrapped your arms around around his chest. His hands released the towel and it pooled at his ankles, you caressed his chest with a hand._ **

****

**_"Master," You murmured against his chest with closed eyes. "I am sorry, but I don't think I am ready yet." Negan's smile slowly began to fall and he pulled away._ **

****

**_"That's fine, doll. I can wait for-" His eyes run over your figure, you are dressed down in a pair of sneakers, shorts, and a dirty blue button up. The button up was not yours, however, Negan would have known. He would never miss who wore that type of shit around this compound. "What are you wearing?"_ **

****

**_"Oh, it's Simon's shirt." You directed your gaze down and pinched at the fabric, Negan cocked his head. "He gave me a couple of shirts of his that he doesn't wear anymore. He always does."_ **

****

**_"Oh, I see. Well then..." He just couldn't take you seriously with what you were wearing. That was his second lieutenant's shirt, if people saw you wearing that and then kissing Negan, what would that make Negan? "Can you take it off? Maybe you can stop wearing those for like fucking ever?" He tried to sound calm as he said it, but there was no doubt it irked him that you were in another man's clothing._ **

****

**_"Negan, are you jealous?" You were laughing at him, which only seemed to make him feel more aggravated and betrayed._ **

****

**_"Doll, usually when a woman wears a man's shirt it is because they are fucking." Your laughter abruptly stopped and you gulped, your entire exterior becoming serious._ **

****

**_"I have never had sex with him, Negan, he just donates to me a lot. He's like a brother to me."_ **

****

**_"Do you love him?" You snorted and wrapped your arms around Negan again, he rested his chin on your head and patted your back hesitantly._ **

****

**_"I love him as a friend, not like I love you."_ **

****

**_"Well how much do you love me?"_ **

****

**_"As much as if you are my own breath."_ **

 

"She wouldn't fucking dare. The shirt thing was because Simon passed things onto her." Negan explained forcefully, his hand tightening around the necklace to an almost breaking strength.

 

"What about the underwear thing then?" Amber was close again, rubbing his inner thigh and who was Negan to push her away? It was comfortable. He hadn't had any sexual contact for about a week and the rubbing felt good.

 

"That was a fucking bet that she lost to."

 

"A bet? Or perhaps a wrestling match Negan? I have more evidence, but you wouldn't believe me unless you saw it yourself."

 

"Tell me." His chest was heaving slightly, all this information, all of these... lies? Or are they truths?

 

"One day I saw them on their way to game night together..." Negan remembered that day, he was busy so he told you to go to Dwight's on your own and he would be there in a little bit. "They were joking at first, until (Y/N) pushed him up against the wall and smothered him with kisses... working her way down and-"

 

"Stop." He wasn't saying that just because she was talking about Simon and you, which disgusted him greatly, but also because her hand was grasping onto his bulge. She was stroking him, moving her hand up and down over his pants. 

 

"You know Negan, I am sure she doesn't give you that type of attention. Does she?"

 

"You are crossing dangerous waters." Yet Negan had yet to stop her from her ministrations.

 

"I don't care if you use me as a vessel for your pleasure, as a submissive little slut, I just want you to know that I am so much more than her. She would ruin you at your own expense, make you feel pain. While me, I would never do such a thing to you, I would never hurt you like that, force you to be my bitch."

 

"I am not her bitch." The zipper was being tugged down by Amber's sharp nails, she ripped them open to reveal his half hard cock.

 

"Amber-"

 

"You aren't complaining very much, Daddy. Don't worry I am going to make you feel all better." 

 

"Amber..." Negan's voice became breathy and he closed her eyes as her hand engulfed his hard member. "I don't want this."

 

"If you didn't..." She licked him and his breathing faltered. "Then you would make it stop and I have a feeling..." Lick. "You don't want that." The necklace slowly began to slide from his hand, falling endlessly into the earth, Lucille discarded to the side as Amber brought Negan to climax. Thesee were not the only things discarded that night, Negan's trust in you was wavering fast and there was nothing you could do about it.


	10. Day Seven Continued: Choices

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> While Negan is searching for you, you are spending time with Jesus. He tells you some things about Negan that were probably best left unsaid.

Hilltop...

 

"I want to get some more sun, go for a walk maybe?" You offered as Dr. Carson moved back and forth about the room, arranging things to look as so.

 

"That sounds good, just please be careful. I will see if Jesus can take you." You froze up and not your bottom lip.

 

"I actually would rather go with you." You rolled your eyes at Carson's answer, as you had expected:

 

"I am very busy right now, but we can talk later if you'd like. Besides Jesus is a kind man, you just have to have to warm up to him." You crossed your arms, dangling a leg over the side of the bed.

 

"He is a complete asshole. Who cares if he looks like fucking Jesus? He doesn't act like it." Perhaps you were being a little biased, so far the both you had ever bonded over Negan and that isn't even bonding.

 

"Actually he very much does, he helps a lot around here and in some cases he is the voice of reason." Your nostrils flared and you groaned, waiting for Carson to go get Jesus. He left the room and came back a few moments later with the man himself, a bent up and dirty wheelchair at his feet.

 

"You can't be serious. I am not going to push myself around in that thing."

 

"It's a precaution, (Y/N). You are my patient remember?"

 

"I don't want to be anyone's patient really." Carson gave you a scathing look and you silenced, you were then put into the chair and sent off into Hilltop with Jesus. There were two reasons why you didn't want to be there: 1) You wanted to go find Negan and confirm if he was the one who had done this to you or not. 2) You knew almost everyone that was at Hilltop and they knew you. Without Negan it was embarrassing being there, in a wheelchair with hardly anyone else aside from Carson to actually relate to.

 

Jesus didn't talk much in the beginning, he stopped the both of you by the vegetable gardens and you both had lunch. Eventually the day was at its end and you were feeling tired and dizzy. You would have had to admit that Jesus wasn't that bad to have around, side from the fact that neither of you talked much, everyone around Hilltop liked him. At your request, Jesus brought you to sit at the top of the steps leading up to George's mansion. You knew why George, the supposed leader, had not come to confront you. There was no other man on this earth that scared him more than Negan. You being known as Negan's personal gal must had been intimidating to George on its own.

 

"Can I ask you something?" Jesus said, you couldn't help but crack a smile at him. He had hardly talked to you up until then, you were hoping he would budge so he could tell you what was wrong. Not that you truly cared, but you were a very curious individual. "Why do you support Negan? Why did you go to the Sanctuary?" You internally shouted to the heavens, looking back away to the open view of all of Hilltop. You didn't want to answer his stupid questions, all he wanted was for you to agree that Negan was a bad man and you could never do that. Negan was not a bad man. "Listen, I don't know your relationship to him, but the Doctor has told me enough for me to know that it is serious..." You tilted your head over to look at him in your peripheral, keeping focused on that same old man you had made a pick up line for a long time ago. You missed those days, when you weren't so conflicted. What love could do to someone. "You seem smart and collected, which is why I want you to know what Negan does."

 

"I already know what he does."

 

"Obviously not enough."

 

"I know enough." You wrapped your arms around you and massages at your temple with a finger. "I know that he does what he has to and more, he makes people's lives-"

 

"He killed a child." That caught your attention, extremely fast, your eyes flew to him as if he was beckoning them. Jesus's expression was strict and sorrowful, he stood up and held his hand out. "Let me show you. Maybe you don't know him as much as you think you do."

 

You hesitantly accepted Jesus's hand, he lifted you up from the step to give you support, guiding you to something that might change your whole outlook on Negan. You had plans to leave him already, what would this do? Make it worse? You weren't sure if you really wanted to know about Negan's worst, you had seen it before, he treated you much more differently than others though. So who was to say that his worst side for you was as bad as his worst side to others? 

 

"What did you mean? When you said he had killed a child?" Jesus was leading you towards the edge of the fence, where some of the crops were grown. You passed several people, they were planting and digging up vegetables and weeds. 

 

"We have graves here, for the dead. A while back there was this kid, his parents were killed by the undead..." Jesus stopped, you had wondered why, until you looked over at the pile of dirt beside him. A wooden board stood up along its width, with the engraved name 'Marcus' on it. "He was swinging that bat around and he clipped the kid in the head." You didn't what to feel after hearing this, Negan had killed a child? Did he even care? Did it bother him?

 

"W-When did this happen?" Jesus sighed, he placed his hands on his hips and you moved your hand to his shoulder, leaning into him.

 

"A couple weeks ago," Jesus cleared his throat. "He was an amazing kid." You didn't even know this kid and you were slowly staring to feel a lump forming at the base of your throat. Years were forming at the corner of your eyes, you had always wanted a child, you would never be able to live with yourself if you had ever harmed one, much less kill one. But this was an accident? Negan wouldn't do this, you knew him.

 

"What really happened? I mean, it could have just been an accident."

 

"An accident?" Jesus almost spat the word, his lips pursed in disappointment. "Then that certainly is more reckless than a leader should be."

 

"W-What do you know about leadership?" You were shaken, thoughts running through your head that the man you love might not be all that great. Jesus shrugged and shook his head.

 

"I know that it doesn't include this." He gestured to the several other graves that you had not taken notice of before. About twenty of them lines up side by side and a name on each block of wood that lined their invisibly heads. "Negan has killed most of these people, one way or another. Innocents who have done nothing more than try to survive."

 

"He wouldn't do that, he deals out punishments but-"

 

"How he punishes always ends with this, how could you follow someone that can do that?" He gestured to the graves, your eyes falling upon cluttered dirt and rotten wood. You had never realized that it had gone this far, that Negan would go to such a great extent to emphasize his power over everyone. How could you love someone like that? As a doctor it was your job to preserve the human condition, not harm it or destroy. Negan went against all of those things and he didn't do it to survive, he did it because he liked to strike fear into others. But killing a child? That had gone too far. He didn't even seem to care, if it had been weeks ago you would have noticed it if he had somehow been affected by such actions. You didn't see that, you didn't see it at all, he himself didn't even follow his own rules. How could you love a man like that?

 

"I don't know." You honestly didn't know, why did you love him? After all that he had done to you, after all that he still did. He never loved you, he use to make fun of you, he made Amber pregnant when he was with you. He was a monster. You use to never believe it, you use to deny that he was truly a good man, but now you had proof. You couldn't let that slide from your conscious thought. Negan was a murderer. You felt sick to your stomach as your mind began to process these things. That all of this time wth Negan, all of this trust that you had given him, he was a liar.

 

"If you aren't one of Negan's wives then how does that make you look? Are you a mistress? His own personal slave? What about this?" He pointed to your forehead, where the bandage remained. "He must have done that to you, who else?"

 

"You think he lied to me?" Jesus released a hissing sound as he took in a deep breath. 

 

"He lies to everyone. Told us that we were to only give him a quarter of our stuff, now he talks a half of it. Tells us that he won't hurt hurt anyone, his men aren't included in that promise. Some of us don't even eat more than a couple cans of food in two weeks." You were a supporter of this, or at least you had been. You supported the starvation and struggle of these people, being with Negan you were so lost to other things that you had never noticed it. The Sanctuary may not have looked pretty, but it provided. It provided because Negan expected more from the other factions, he expressed everything that they had.

 

 The truth was that you had had enough of Negan, he would never love you like you loved him. For all you knew it could have very well been him that had done this to you. Regardless of how he had taken care of you when you were wounded before, if he had the stoicism to kill a child and not care, he could try and kill you just the same. Slender fingers crept into your palm, you glanced down to find that they were Jesus'. You followed his arm up to his shoulders, then to his head, where thick brunette strands of hair caressed his cheeks.

 

"Stay Here, where it's safe. I don't know you that well, but we can get to know one another. I just can't see anyone else getting hurt by him." You forced a smile that was lacking vigor and your fingers grasped his hand back.

 

"Carson was right, you really are the resurrection of Christ." Jesus snorted, his bright white smile glowing like the sun's rays. 

 

"Let's go back." You offered, where Jesus nodded and you both went back to the medic. Carson was there at his desk, surprised to find the both of you close together as you entered.

 

"Looks like you two have become good friends."

 

"Maybe." You teased as Jesus led you to the cot so you could sit. You were both physically and mentally exhausted, all day having been out in the sun and it felt nice but it was tiring. You slumped down into the pillows, Jesus patting your hand softly.

 

"I have to go. Think about what I said." That last phrase caused you to pause, you hadn't forgotten so easily, but you didn't want to think about it.  You didn't want to worry about what you were, who Negan was, what he had become. 

 

"I will." Jesus gave a nod of his head before waving to Carson and exiting the room. You laid back with a sigh and closed your eyes, thinking that you were finally at peace, until Dr. Caron interrupted the silence.

 

"Are you still leaving in a couple of days?" He asked softly, he had approached and the back of his hand touched your forehead to check your temperature. 

 

"Yeah, but I am not going home."

 

"Then where to?"

 

"I don't know." You did, you truly did, but you weren't going to tell anyone, you couldn't risk the teasing. Carson left you to go fetch dinner, the cot son your mind turning as you thought over your next course of action. You were determined to complete this mission, to complete this trip. Without Negan.


	11. Day Eight:Found

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan finds who is looking for, but is he prepared to do what he has planned?

 

   It was earlier that morning when the group had finally made it to Hilltop. Negan was hoping to find you there, if anything to confront you about your traitorous side. If you were not there then that could have meant only one thing to him, you were gone, out on your own and he would never see again. After the previous night, he kept wondering if maybe that was for the best. He wasn't so sure about your true character anymore and there was no way he was going to pull you closer if he doubted you. He wasn't an idiot. However, if everything that Amber had said was true then you needed to be eliminated from this world.

 

   Upon his arrival the residents of Hilltop were preparing their supplies for him to take, until they realized that he was not there for them. Boxes of vegetables and fruits, grains and so forth, were all put back into their supply for Negan's next visit. The children dispersed and explored Hilltop, curiously looking about with keen interest. They had never seen a more developed safe haven than Hilltop, which was far more extravagant as compared to dirty and smelly cabins in the woods. 

 

   At first Gregory had approached Negan, sputtering apologies and brown nosing his way into Negan's good side. Negan chose to ignore him completely, he wasn't going to listen to associate with a coward at the moment. He ignored Gregory like he had ignored Simon and Fat Joe, pushing everyone away except for Amber. Amber, who consistently reminded him of the night before when she had brought him to his peak. He worried less about those things, less about the repercussions of his own actions. He just wanted to know where you were, but he hadn't caught any sight of you since he had showed up.

 

     It was just him, walking around Hilltop, searching for any chance that you might have ended up there. He looked everywhere, even going as far as to check the mansion, but he might have passed over several possible places, too aggravated to actually pay attention that you might occupy them. The others were busying themselves with the locals; Simon and Ashlynn flirting with one another under a tree, Fat Joe picking at the boxes of vegetable, Amber on the other hand was with Negan. 

 

That question was answered when Negan caught sight of you with a very familiar face, he was standing not to far a distance away when that familiar face smiled at you. You returned that smile with one that Negan had thought he was the only one to have ever seen. That familiar face was the same man he had set free a couple months ago, when he had left you with Peter to dwell in your faulty love. The both of you were standing next to the med-bay, you were giggling and shifting about. You looked happy, you looked glowing, fuller. There was a white banadage scaling from your left brow to the back of your temple. Negan's eyes scanned your figure for any signs of stress, or forced captivity. He found neither of them. You weren't struggling or crying, and most importantly you weren't calling out to him. It was almost like you didn't need him. 

 

"Look at that. Isn't that weird?" Amber came up beside him and crossed her arms as she looked upon the seen. "That she already has found a replacement for you? For Simon?" Negan was furious. He was the angriest he had ever been in his entire life, Lucille was stiff against his palm, heavy on his shoulder. The left side of his lips twitched and his hips swayed.

 

"That fucking cunt." He whispered under his breath, however, through all that anger he couldn't find it in himself to disturb you. You hadn't taken notice of him yet, but the entire Hill had stopped their business to watch from a safe distance. Jesus was touching you, patting your back and giving you a portion of his mild humor.

 

"Looks like they have known each other for a long time..." A serpent hissed, critiquing the actions of Jesus and you. "More proof that she has been plotting against you, maybe she wanted us to show up." Negan's eyes were a shade darker, his eyebrows furrowing into them with an expression of fury. He took the first step, then one foot in front of the other until you were gazing at him with wide eyes. If he had been wanting to shock you he would have accomplished that much, but he didn't, he wanted to kill you. He wanted to kill you because of what you did, what you had done: you made him feel pain.

 

Since the information Amber had given him, he had been thinking about you in a whole different light. He thought about all those mornings you would wake up next to him in his arms, how you made him feel when you would kiss the tip of his nose and smile. He thought about all those late nights watching the same movie over and over again, relishing in how fairy tales can really be a reality. He thought about your body, what it did to him, how it was his weakness. All Lies. You used them to keep him close, you used it them keep him ignorant.

 

"Negan..." Jesus stepped back at Negan's presence. "W-What are you doing here?" Negan was took irate to talk, his eyes traced your face. You weren't smiling anymore, he couldn't determine what you were thinking or feeling, the look on your face was that of something he had never seen before. His breath made a wavering sound as it blew out from his nostrils, like an angry bull. 

 

"What am I doing here?" His voice was condescending, critical of your every move. Your throat bobbed as you gulped down the fear that was so visible on your face. He saw your hands shaking at her sides, you rose one hand up to press on the bandage gently. He gritted his teeth, moistening his lips, he could hardly look at you without feeling the urge to strangle you. "I think the question should fucking be, what are you fucking doing here?" He ground out and Jesus was silent, leaving you to fall into the rocks on your own. 

 

"I was-I was-" You were afraid. The last time you were this afraid was when you had to kill Vic. You weren't prepared to see Negan face to face, you weren't prepared to confront your demon. Seeing his face made you think of all the things you had done together and all of the things that he had done to everyone else. He would hold you in his arms, the Negan you knew and the Negan that these people knew, were the same Negan no excuses. He reached towards you, you flinched away causing his hand to stop mid-air. His eyes focused on you, he continued his movement to grab the knob of the med-bay behind you. He turned the knob and scuffled out of the way as he opened it, the door blocking Jesus from your view. Jesus stepped around to meet your worried gaze, you feel like you can't breath. 

 

"Go inside now. We are going to have a very long fucking talk."

 

"She doesn't want to go with you." Jesus finally took the stand, Negan glared over his shoulder at him. You waved a hand in his direction and entered the truck. 

 

"I will be fine, Jesus." Negan stomped up the steps after you, the door slammed behind you and you jolted. Carson must have been out and about, the papers that were usually on his desk were absent. The room made you uncomfortable in that moment, but yesterday you would have done anything to keep yourself in it. It was so quiet, that same quiet you had wanted when you had first found yourself there. You figured it was because neither of you knew how to start the conversation. You were confused for the most part, you were wondering why Negan wasn't on his way to Disney World at that point, why he hadn't just gone without you.

 

"Should-" You closed your eyes and took a deep breath. "Shouldn't you be on your way to Disney World?" You heard the thump of Lucille as she met the marble floor of the room, propped up against the wall beside the door.

 

"Sit down." His command was firm and unwavering, you sat down on the edge of the cot. The covers still jumbled and messy from earlier that morning, when you had slept there. Negan glowered at you for a long moment before stalking over to Carson's desk and taking a seat. He faced the chair towards you, his hands placed flatly onto his knees. You could hear his breath, your own muted under the nervous nature of the moment. You truly felt like you were starving for Oxygen, like your body couldn't handle this any further. Your fists clutched at the loose fabric of the sweat pants you wore as if your life depended on it.

 

"The whole reason I wanted to fucking go to Disney World..." He cleared his throat. "(Y/N)," He never used your first name, and if he did it was because of business, even when angry he called you by your pet name. "Was so that I could do fucking this." His legs were like wooden boards, straight off the chair with the heels of his boots against the marble. He shifted as his hand reached down into the front pocket of his leather jacket, where he pulled an object from it. He held it up after finding a steady grip on it, pinched between his forefinger and thumb. You felt yourself grow stiff, your mind go blank. Between his fingers was a diamond ring, the diamond was huge and a big excessive, the silver holding it in place to create a circlet for one' finger. "I was going to ask you to fucking marry me." 

 

You slowly wrapped your arms around yourself, tears starting to form at the corner of your eyes, thick and bloody like that of one suffering. No matter what Negan did you still loved him, you still loved a monster, but he could have done this to you. He could have been the one to have tried to kill you, regardless of whether he wanted to marry you or not. 

 

You should have been more accepting of this trip, any other woman would have gladly gone under Negan's arm and would have waltzed with him to another world away from this one. But that didn't mean it was your fault for not wanting to go, Negan didn't explain himself and Amber was pregnant. If he thought that you were really going to go to marry him after finding that out then he was wrong. You wished that these things weren't the case, if so then you would fall to your knees before him and beg him for your forgiveness. He had that much control over you, over your heart. 

 

"N-Neg-" Negan flicked the ring out of his hand, it landed somewhere in the room with a cling. 

 

"You. Thought. What?" You held a hand over the bandage on your head as it pulsed like a bruise. A single tear streamed down your cheek, trailing across your skin. "Oh don't even fucking dare!" He pointed an accusing finger at you, his eyes burning with fire. "All those fucking crocodile tears are shit! And I can see right through them now." He jumped up from the seat and you flew back, burying yourself deeper into the jumbled covers. He started to pace, quick and choppy. "Did you really think that I would never find out your little plan?" He was yelling at this point, his expression fuming and hot like a boiling pot about to explode. He missed the pause in your motions, the slow ripple of consternation that overtook your emotions and fueled the sensations that came over you.

 

"What do you-" He slammed his hand down on the bed post, you stood up too suddenly and you wobbled over towards the desk chair, using it as support.

 

"Don't you fucking dare. I am fucking everywhere you little shit, I would have fucking found out eventually."

 

"Negan, I don't even know what you are talking about."

 

"You left because you realized that you weren't getting anywhere with me, killing me, forcing my people against me. That is what you would have fucking done."

 

"Ne-" Your chest was heaving, you sat down into the chair as all the blood rushes to your head. The throbbing increased with intensity, you averted your eyes to the ground, too scared to say or do anything.

 

"You've been fucking around, but you haven't been playing me, it has always been the other way around! You see I fucking knew you were doing this bullshit from the beginning. This fucking trip was meant for me to single you out and the marriage thing was going to be a fucking lie so I could fuck you and then kill you for your stupid fucking tricks. I knew from day one that you were working against me and I have been using you every day since! You are nothing more to me than a pair of pussy lips for me to stick my dick in." You were speechless, your mind couldn't process anything. You had removed your mental state from the floor as soon as he had made his declaration on using you. Your lips were parted and at this point there was no hiding the tears rolling from your eyes in thick wads. At the look on your face Negan retracted, he inhaled through his nose and exhaled through his lips. "And don't think Simon won't get it for this, for what you have done. He will get punished, but not before I settle things with you directly in front of him."

 

"What are you talking about?" You finally found yourself, instead of feeling sorrowful or stressed or fucking confused, you were enraged. You stood to your full height, your head hurting and your reflexes slow. "Did Simon do this to me? I don't fucking understand. What are you even saying?" Your mind, although making an effort to seem strong, was breaking down and your words were nearly silent and torn. Negan's head moved from side to side, his eyes were unable to meet yours as he pondered your words, your reaction. He cleared his throat and put his hands on his hips before looking up again.

 

"Simon, did what?" You wiped your tears away, far beyond the point of being able to cope with this. You couldn't bottle this up inside, you couldn't accept what Negan was saying. 

 

"This..." You pointed to the bandage with a sniffle. "I woke up here two days ago, they told me that they had found me unconscious. Someone had tried to kill me." Negan was unsure how to move forward with that information. He thought you had left... but that still didn't leave out the possibility that you were against him, you could be playing him right then and there.

 

"I don't believe you." 

 

"Really?! You don't fucking believe me?! Negan, what is your problem?!" You sighed and allowed your hands to fall to your sides. "What have I done? Can't you just let me go." Negan shook his head.

 

"You have been lying to me all this time. You have been trying to get closer and closer, until you are close enough to kill me, or seduce me into doing your own fucking bidding and I won't let that happen. You have been fucking other men around the compound, spreading-"

 

"Who told you this?" Negan lifted his nose, his tongue sliding around the inside of his cheeks, lips pouting. 

 

"I have always known. I knew from the beginning." There was nothing that hurt more than that and the fact that he had said it to your face, that it wasn't from Amber or any one else, it killed you inside.

 

"So you have been lying to me this entire time? You don't care about me?" Negan cocked his head to the side, he chose his words wisely, but today he wasn't going to be wise. He was sick of everyone thinking that he wasn't the real deal, he could be as harsh a leader he could be an intelligent one.

 

"It wouldn't be any different then you lying to me all this fucking time." He got closer to you, close enough to where you could feel his breath funneling around your face. That cynical smile of his drew up his lips, you did not take notice to the forced nature. "Sounds like we have been playing each other real good, haven't we?"

 

Snap. That was all it took. You knew that love carried a lot of drama and attention, but that was before the world turned to shit, this was ridiculous. Your hand came up and slapped across his cheek with a harsh smack. His head flung to the side and his hand coming up to caress the now tender mark. There was no moment of apologies or surprise, you didn't regret this and Negan appeared to have expect it.

 

"Remember that thing I said about not hitting women?" You began to distance yourself very slowly.

 

"You are the exception." You darted towards the door when he lunged towards you, his large hands reaching for your neck. You made it to the door and flipped it open with a jerk of the knob, spilling out the door with Negan close behind. He chased you and tackled you to the ground, straddling your waist.

 

"You fucking-" He rose a fist up and went to punch down, until you kicked up between his legs. His hands snapped down to his crotch and he made a hiss, you praised this moment and flipped him over. You made a fist across his face, his hands removed from his groin to push at your own. His leather hand burning against your cheek as he slapped it, hard. You fell back and he flipped you over again, this time his hands went your neck. Your hands roved over his wrists, flashbacks of your encounter with Peter rising up from the depths of your mind. You closed your eyes and whimpered, biting your bottom lip and waiting for the inevitable. 

 

 Negan could easily break you with his hands, his stature was far larger and his strength far more imposing over you. His fingers clenched around your slender neck, you sniffled and clawed at his hands, pressing at his chest. His fingers loosened and you stopped struggling, gazing up into Negan's eyes. He himself was tearing up, you had never seen Negan cry before. He grunted and the pressure of his fingers increased, you choked and gasped for air. Not once closing your eyes and looking away from his.

 

"Fuck..." His hands were thrown away completely, he leaned his head down and pressed his forehead to yours. His knuckles caressed and his fingers clung to you; part of you wanted him to go away, the other wanting him to hold you tight and whisper his apologies. But those things were wiped from your mind at the smell of him, at the warmth. You couldn't keep yourself from winding an arm around his neck, resting your chin on the edge of his shoulder. You could hear him sobbing, so unlike him to cry, into the crevice of your neck.  

 

"Negan, what are you doing? She will kill you!" The voice in the background was ignored, your eyelids shut and the adrenaline in your body began to wore off, the repetitive throbbing in your head was endless.

 

"Negan..." You whispered, thinking of the only thing that had ever made sense, the only words that would ever really consume you. "It's going to be okay. It's alright..." He pulled away, his windows boring into your own. "I still love you, no matter what." You traced his face until you found his cheek, eyes still closed. "Please get off of me now. Please." Negan placed his hands on either side of your head and pushed up, he lifted himself off of you and stiff to his full height. You then noticed the blood dripping from his nose, his busted lip and bruised 

face. You didn't say anything, you weren't sure if either of you could say something that would fix this. Your neck was swollen, bruises already forming from Negan's grasp on your skin.

 

"What about Simon and you-"

 

"I would never." You brought a hand up to cup your sore throat.

 

"What about trying to-"

 

"I just told you." Negan's shoulders drooped as he let out one long sigh. He brushed his eyes and let out a faulty cough, he was staring at Amber at that point.

 

"How could you believe her Negan? After everything she has done to us."

 

"Simon..." Simon wasn't too far away and he stepped up towards Negan. "Take Amber and the others back to the Sanctuary, (Y/N) and I have some things we have to discuss." 

 

"But what... What do you... Negan, I don't think you understand. I am pregnant with your child."

 

"Says who?" Everyone looked to the oh-so- great Doctor Carson, he approached from the mansion with his kit in hand. "I can always give you a pregnancy test to make sure." 

 

"B-But-but..." Amber's words trailed off, Negan frowned as his eyes came to a glinting piece of medal hanging from around her neck. He wasted no time stomping over to her and snatching it from her slimy skin. He held it up before her face and between clenched teeth said:

 

"I swear if you are not carrying a child, I will give you the most painful and slowest death this world has ever seen." He went to turn away only to be grabbed by her, her hands wrapping around his arm in hast.

 

"N-Negan, I love you. Please don't leave me like this, please don't go with her. What about last night?"

 

"Last night was a chance for me to get some stress relief, I didn't do anything to you."

 

"So-So you used me?"

 

"That's what you expected wasn't it?" She doesn't reply, her fingers slipped from his arm as realization dawned on her face. She had lost... this time. She watched as Negan turned towards you, he stepped forward until he was within your grasp. "Let's go for a ride, just you and I this time."

 

"Negan-"

 

"We can borrow one of their trucks here, pick a nice ball busting little spot somewhere and just fucking talk." You peered down at his hand, then back up to his face. He knew you were hesitant, but he also knew that at least both him and you were on the same page in that moment. You both hated each other's guts, you both loved each other's guts, and the both of you were just about ready to beat the shit out of each other again.

 

"Alright." You tucked your hands under your armpits and followed after Negan as he walked to the mansion to pick up the keys from Gregory. 


	12. Day Eight Continued: Adventure

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan and you head out on the road, alone this time, and as things are admitted they also start to heat up. Will Negan and you finally get what you both deserve?

"Do you think Weasley and Buttercup ever fucked?" You pulled your eyes from the road to glare over at Negan, such an odd question to ask in the situation that you both were in, he didn't look in your direction. His eyes focused solely on the road ahead, but that amusement wasn't hidden very well on his part.

After Negan was given keys to a truck, he grabbed Lucille and forced you to drive off with him. The children were upset that Disney World was not in their near future, but Negan had gladly explained to you at the beginning of the ride that at least they were safe. Aggravated and annoyed were understatements compared to how you felt at this moment. You had been on the road with him for about two hours and he had yet to stop anywhere for this 'talk' of his. Instead making references to 'the Princess Bride' every so often and other movies the both of you had watched together, while also making corny puns and jokes on the side.

"Technically she has his kid." Negan scooted around in his chair, a grin appearing on his face at your reply.

"Oh yeah? So they do end up fucking." He said under his breath with something of realization. You rolled your eyes and crossed your arms, moving your sight back to where it previously was.

"How else are babies made?" You were sympathetic for him, despite all the things he had done. Despite what he had done to you a couple hours ago. You still loved the man as if he was the sweetest being on earth, you still cared about him. You were just stuck that was all, you didn't know whether he deserved your forgiveness or not. You were willing to leave the Sanctuary forever, if it meant that Negan wasn't going to hurt you anymore.

"By fucking doll, why are you asking me?" You shook your head in disappointment, on the verge of tears. He wasn't taking this seriously at all, you both almost killed each other, he almost killed you. The things he said about you, how could you forget them.

"Negan, can you just stop the car?" His eyes jumped to you, you were on the verge of releasing tears again as today had been extremely emotional for you, even these past few days and you weren't sure what to think, his smile slid from his face. He pulled over to the side of the empty road and put the truck in park. It was a pick up truck and for some reason Simon had loaded a bunch of stuff into the back. You had a feeling that this was more than just finding a destination to talk about each other. His hands slumped down into his lap and he sat back with utter reluctance.

"Look d-"

"Stop. We almost tried to kill each other and you are acting like this is fucking nothing, like we can just be together again." You grabbed the handle on the door and clicked it open, sliding out of the vehicle and shutting the door as you went. Negan jumped out after you on his side, running around the truck to obstruct your path. You were going to walk back, it was all that had came to your mind, the escape plan you could devise. You would leave him so he could never hurt you again.

"Now wait a second, buttercup..." His hands were held up and his cheeks were taut with nervousness. "Can't we again?" Your eyes closed over and you bit your bottom lip. The sun was coming down and the wind was heavy across your bodies, nearly pushing your weak state into the forest beside you both.

"You said some really hurtful things."

"Well it's not like you didn't say the same."

"You fuck other woman like it's nothing, I was speaking the truth." His mouth shut and he didn't give a retort, his hands gripped his hips and he let out a shallow breath. His eyes couldn't look at you again, you knew he felt guilty, which confused you greatly. He was a murderer. He didn't feel guilty about that kid he had killed, or all of those other people. "Ne-"

"I love you." His admittance sent a ripple through your body, it emanated from your arteries and acres of veins. That single phrase might just had been the very end of your existence. You had always wanted to hear him say that to you, since the day that you had found yourself in love with him. It seemed like the perfect time for him to say it, for him to finally confess, too perfect... "I can't kill you, whether you have done the things I have been told or not. I love the everloving fuck out of you."

"I haven't, I haven't done any of those things." You uttered under a bated breath, your mind racing alongside your heart, breathing through your chest. "Y-You love me? Do you really because um..."

"Because what? What you don't feel the same for me anymore? I thought you told me no matter-"

"I do love you Negan, I always will." You couldn't understand how. "I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but after the events of today." You shook your head. "You kill people, you kill innocent people, you can kill me too. What you said showed me how little I am to you."

"What I said was uncalled for, completely shitty, do whatever you want with me for it. But don't forget that you kill people too."

"Negan, I have never truly killed anyone on my own, you have always been there with me." You struggled with yourself, going between pushing past him to leave or staying to endure this conflict. "And I have never killed a child." You heard his breath stop, watching as he shifted around in the dirt.

"Who told you about that?"

"Jesus." Negan's elbow pressed deep into the edge of the truck bed when he leaned over, his forehead falling flat into the palm of his hand.

"I didn't want you to know."

"He was a child and you hardly even-"

"I thought about that shit for weeks, I couldn't stand to fucking sleep at night." His forehead lifted up from the crevice of his hand, he was hiding himself from shame. "He was bitten and no one else was willing to do the deed, so I did. Did I want to? Fuck no. Did I live with that shit? Yes I did." He sounded much angrier now, almost furious and you knew it must have been with himself. "I put that on myself, I did something that no one else was willing to do."

"Why didn't you fucking tell me?" You barked at him, not really sure where that had came from.

"I never said a fucking word to you because I thought..." He pointed an accusing finger. "That you would hate my fucking guts for it. Everyone else did." He dropped that finger and his body spun away so he could overlook the tree line. "I cried today..." Your chin met your chest and you inspected your closely knit fingers. "I haven't cried like that since I saw Lucille turn into one of those things. It's because you keep me grounded, you keep me fucking sane." He adjusted his footing, almost nervously. "How dare you accuse me of having no shitty fucking feelings."

"I never said that." Your voice was monotone, almost as if the conversation was irrelevant, but it really was. You just were neutral, you didn't know anything at this point.

"Then what did you say? Because I sure as fuck never asked for your opinion on who I do and don't kill. Just because I kill people doesn't mean I am going to kill you and it doesn't meant that I can't feel because of it."

"The stuff you said about me Negan, you said then to my face..." Your eyes wandering with your beaten skull as you found something in your surroundings to take your attention. "It hurts so bad. That you could have possibly just been using me this entire time, that you could have fucking lied just a minute ago about how you loved me. You called me a whore, you accused me of being false, of plotting against you. I love you, but that love can be toxic for me. I don't know what to do, after all that how couldn't you be able to kill me?" His hand reached for yours, he held it up, his thumb caressing your bruised knuckles.

"I can't live without you. I can't keep doing this. I gave up all of my fucking wives for you, I did it because you mean the fucking world to me. I never meant any of that shit I had said, I am self conscious about us. I don't know any human being that could love me after seeing the things that I do, you look past all of that. How could a woman as fucking beautiful and daring as you love a man like me? I shouldn't have doubted you, I shouldn't have considered any of it. I jumped too fast at the possibility that you would betray me, because it just seems so unreal what we have, but you have always fucking been there for me and I will always wait for you for as long as you are at my fucking side. Just forgive me... P-" He stuttered, taking in a deep breath through his lips. You had never heard him say that word before, you had never heard him beg. "Please, forgive me." His finger tips caressed over the smooth back of your wrist, littered with fresh cuts and dried dirt, you moved one hand to place over the other. You knew he meant every word, but he made you look like a goddess when he said it. You weren't a goddess, but he wasn't a god and your mind made him look that way. He felt exactly what you been feeling that entire time, he knew how it was to worship

You leaned over, closer and closer till your nose was touching his. His eyes fluttered shut and you closed the distance between your parched lips. The kiss was slow at first and frozen in time, your lips parted as his tongue slithered in between them. You scooted closer, wrapping your arms around his neck, hugging him. His stubble rubbing against your cheeks, creating a very pleasant burn. His free palm gradually came up to caress your cheek, fingers tracing the contour of your face and the thick bulge of your scar. He pulled away with his forehead connected to yours, it was an oh so familiar action of intimacy. You loved it, looking into his eyes and him into yours as if you both were the only two alive.

"So when do Buttercup and Pirate Roberts actually fuck?" You snorted, a smile tugging along the edges of your lips.

"I don't think they do in the movie."

"No I am talking about the porno version." Your forehead parted from his for a moment as your head dropped so you could giggle. "God I fucking love that smile of yours..." You were gazing up at him again, this time with an entirely different feeling in you. There was still that undertone of anger and frustration, sorrow and pain, and mostly hesitance. But you wanted him. You wanted him as soon as you looked into his eyes, as soon as you saw that darkness you wanted him to engulf you in it. "That's a real, uh, coincidence."

"What is?"

"This is where the Saviors found you, remember?" You looked around, finally taking notice of how truly familiar you were with the area. "On this exact road too."

"How do you know that?"

"I asked Simon when you were brought to the Sanctuary. The day I asked you to work for me and you said 'yes'." You stared at him, thinking about all of the good things that happened to you because of him. Negan really did care about you, he made mistakes like any other person in this extreme world. You truly did love him.

"Negan, we can go ya'know? We can leave forever and never come back. Let the Sanctuary go, let your wives go, let the responsibility go."

"Where would you want to go?" Negan's fingers creep around your back to bring you closer.

"Somewhere, somewhere far away from here. I don't care where as long as you are with me."

"Someday... just you and me."

"Promise." You kissed at the corner of his lips, exchanging breathes with a need for one another.

"I fucking promise." He cornered you against the side of the truck, his lips moving with yours languidly, tongues smacking and fighting. Your hands ran over the chest of his jacket, nails biting at the flawless leather. You felt the press of his hips against you, harder and harder, the spot between your legs pulsed with want. You couldn't go back on this, your body wouldn't be able to handle that tension at this point. You ground yourself into him, Negan using his knee to buckle your legs out and around him. His lips traveled with his tongue, wet and hot around your lips and across your jaw. By then it had escalated to pure lust, Negan bent down slightly to wrap his large hands under your thighs and lift you up. Your back slammed into the truck, the noise that left your mouth was a mix between a yelp and a moan.

"Negan don't stop." You plead, he chuckled lowly in your ear, his skilled fingers moving down to start shimmying the sweats from your legs.

"You must be fucking insane to think that I fucking would, buttercup." You removed your legs from around his waist for a moment as your pants were basically torn from your lower half. You could grip at the bump bulging out from his jeans, his hips snapped up in between your legs. The fabric giving a nice friction over the thin material that covered your throbbing core, dripping with sweet nectar. You had been untouched for so long, you hadn't even masturbated on your own at all recently. The mere pressure on your clit, the intensity of his lips and his movements. The ripples of an orgasm in you began with a warming sensation followed by the breaking of a coil at the bottom of your gut. You clasped onto him and it overtook your body, shaking you to the bone as you held Negan closely, moaning to your hearts content. He was breathless already and thoroughly aroused, his actions coming to a halt as he gazed down at you with a look of bewilderment.

"Did you just fucking cum?" You licked your lips and nodded your head, sweat beading at your forehead. Negan growled, the hand not holding you up yanked roughly at his belt. The clip of it undoing itself and the release, it swung down from around his waist and the zipper was next.  
"I am going to have so much fucking fun with that." He grunted as he grabbed the edges of the truck bed and ran his hips straight into again. "You want that?" His glove disappeared beneath your underwear and your head flew back with a cry of pleasure.

"Yes! Oh yes." Negan nibbled lightly at your skin, wherever he might think deserves attention. Your earlobe, the skin behind your earlobe, shallowing down to the crevice of your neck.

"I love you! Fuck I love you so fucking much." Another tearing sound as he ripped her underwear off, his bare hand coming to cup at your womanhood. "Fuck you are so fucking wet." He groaned, jutting his hips against you like an animal in heat. That same hand tugged down his boxers, revealed through the split of the open zipper. His cock flung out, it seemed so much more intimidating than when he would be on his way out of the shower or getting dressed. He was about to fuck you and he was about to do it hard. His cock twitched, the head resting against the slit of your desire. Your lips parted as his eyes met yours, asking for permission after all of this time and you were going to give it to him. You gripped yourself against Negan with more strength and filled yourself with his shaft. His fingers creased and dug into the metal of the truck like sharp knifes. "F-Fuck... oh Baby." You cupped the back of his head, lapping at his lips for entrance like a dog would at their water bowl. His hands forced your legs up higher, till they were propped over his shoulder and he was burying himself in you deeper and deeper. You fisted at his sweaty locks of black hair, the greasy texture molding with your fingers.

You could fee him imbedded in you, you could feel all of him. Aside from the slight tinge of pain that his length had wrought, the pleasure outweighed it. All those years of waiting for the right man and here he was, deep within you more than just physical but mental. He was inside your head and your body, you couldn't get his ragged breath from your ears nor his crispy lips. It was rough and wild, but it meant so much more. Like how his hips would slowly retract before thrusting up into you with great intent. Like how his lips traced ever single curve and every crack of your own, followed by the contour of your jaw and the sensitive skin of your neck. His teeth feasting on you like the Big Bad Wolf, plunging into you and drawing marks on your skin. It felt so dirty, but it felt so right.

Everything of earlier that day had finished, his hands sculpting you like the silly little mess you had become. Your hair was in shambles, his scruffier up and melted. Your stomach tightened as another orgasm threw you into the abyss that you had made with him. The noise that left his throat was far more intimate than a growl or a hiss or a groan, instead of a deep moan and his thrusts increased in speed. The ropes falling from his limps wrapped around your tender chin and he kissed you again. With such passion and devotion, such love that your knees were jelly, your heart was a puddle.

He was yours.

In that moment of adoration you could not think of anything else...

He was all yours and yours alone.

His other hand slapped back down onto the truck with a loud thump, you began to gyrate your hips against Negan's body. His lips still attached to you, working you like a fiddle, like his hand caressing the edge of your battle wound.

"Oh Shit, I am going to cum for you."

"Oh fuck cum for me. Do it Negan, do it."

"Say my fucking name. Say it."

"Negan..." You whimpered, on the verge of bursting yourself. Your body tightening around him and you let out a sharp moan, body uncontrollably pressing against him, jerking. "Negan, Negan, Negan." He tensed as if frozen in time, his seed pouring into you as he remained. It pooled in your body, melting your insides into mush. You both held each other, collecting yourselves from the moment. His nose brushing against yours and your eyes closed as the aftershocks of the orgasmic earthquake drew you away. "That was so good." You cleared your throat and swallowed the dryness at the bottom of it.

"You bet it fucking was. Fuck I love your pussy. I wish I could label it."

"That's kind of weird, Negan." You tried to hide your little chortle in the crook of his neck.

"I would name it Leia so that way my dick could be Han." You gasped and your head flew away, your free hand slapping his shoulder, but the damage had already been done. Negan was grinning like the Cheshire Cat again, laughing his ass off with his dick still inside you. Your collected Juices began to flow from the sides of his dick.

"Stop. Stop. I have heard enough." He dropped you to your feet and you stumbled forward, gripping onto the lapels of his jacket to find a more stable footing. You were exhausted, you were still recovering from the concussion and this type of activity would be too much for anybody that was. You placed your head on Negan's chest and closed your eyes, taking a deep breath.

"You tired now?"

"Yeah. I kind of am supposed to be recovering from a concussion as it is so..." His arm wrapped you in an embrace, pulling you close enough so that you weren't standing yourself completely.

"I won't ever let that fucking happen ever again, princess." Not a sound was heard aside from the howling winds and ruffled branches of the trees. A couple of minutes later Negan picked you up into a bridal carry. At this point the sun was setting, leaving beautiful oranges and purples and reds to rest upon the summer sky. He carried you back over to his side of the truck where the door was still wide open and he sat himself in it, adjusting you on his lap. He brushed a few of the hairs from your face as you moved yourself so that your back was against his chest. "Ya'know, you have a really good lefty?" You smiled, not looking up from under his chin as comfortable as you were.

"Why? Does it hurt?"

"I am starting to feel it now, would have knocked any other man out." The hand not pinching the key was rubbing at his stubble.

"Why didn't it knock you out?" You traced a circle at his naked collar bone, feeling the tentative hairs that resided on his chest.

"Because I am myself."

"Do you ever shut up about yourself?"

"Why would I fucking do that when there is so much to talk about?" He teased, you scratched under his beard hard enough for him to wince and silence his jests. The engine rumbled as he flicked the ignition, the truck being brought from park to drive, treading onto the road with a low rumble. "You know where we are going?"

"Yeah we are going to finish this trip."

"That's damn straight. We are going to get to fucking Disney World."

 


	13. Day Nine: Magic

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> You have arrived in the place of your dreams, what will you do first? Negan already has something in mind.

  
A thump against the driver's door caused both Negan and you to shoot awake. Your head bumped against chin causing his jaw to snap shut in with a painful click, your foreheads hit as you directed yours forward. With closed eyes he held his forehead, you doing the same until the thump emanated from the window again. You both looked to your right and found a walker beating against the glass of the door. Negan groaned, it was just one and you weren't even sure where it came from. You had gone to sleep after Negan had brought you back into the truck, still half naked from your earlier ministrations. Your entire body was sore, from between your legs to your thighs and your forehead. Your neck was covered in dark blue bruises, some formed from Negan's fingers during the fight that previous day and others from his lips sucking at your skin. Negan had a purple bruise on his temple and dark circles under his eyes.

"Fucking shits..." You grabbed his hand tightly, your eyes finding the gate laid out before the truck. It was about thirty feet away, big and black with the fancy letters spelling 'Magic Kingdom' across it.

"H-Holy shit." You could barely hold your breath, your grip growing tighter on Negan's hand. "We are here." It appeared that it was mid-day, Negan must have been driving all night while you were sleeping. "You drove the whole way here?!" You excitedly snatched the handle on the door to run out, only for Negan's hand to slap over yours. "Ow, what was that for?"

"There is a fucking walker out there."

"Nothing I can't handle."

"No," His hand reached behind the seat to grab Lucille and he held her up. "Nothing Lucille can't handle." You watched as Negan wiggled your naked lower half out from above him, he exited the car slamming the door open to push the walker back, blood spattered across the clear covering. You exited the vehicle as quickly as be did and went running to the gates of the Theme Park.

"Negan! We are here!"

"I fucking know, calm." Thud against the walkers head, brains flying out and blood spattering onto his jacket. "Your." Smack. "Shit." Smack. He stood up to his full height and glanced up at you, he stepped over the dead walker in your direction. You were holding the bars and grinning at him, a smile appeared on his face as he caught sight of your naked ass.  
"I told you we would make it here." You peaked through the metal bars of the gate, finding a couple deformed hedges here and there, along with dead flowers. All together the entrance to the park had an eerie feeling, it was expected considering it hadn't been tended to since a couple years ago. "Go into the back of the truck and put some fucking pants on, who knows what we might find in there."

"But it looks deserted."

"Go do what I fucking said." He pointed back to the truck as a demand and you went traipsing back to the vehicle. Upon opening the back truck bed you hopped in and began searching for your bag through the various others that Simon had thrown in here. You couldn't find your bag, which kind of pissed you off considering that you had some valuable things in it. You stood up on the back of the bed, looking out to Negan who was investigating the gate.

"Negan!"

"What?!" He shouted back at you, you pointed down to the bags.

"My shit isn't here." He itched back of his head as he started to approach the truck, he vaulted up into the back and picked up a dark brown bag.

"Ash's bag, use her clothes."

"But what about my clothes." He paused and looked up at you, shrugging in response to your question.

"We all had thought that you had left with them, but obviously that wasn't the fucking case, okay?"

"No it fucking wasn't. Someone knocked me unconscious."

"Calm down." He smirked a little, holding his hand up to temper the situation. "It will be alright babe, just wear Ash's stuff for now, okay?" You sucked in a deep breath and nodded your head.

"Ok, so does this mean that I don't have to put on pants?"

"No, put pants on. If some fucking crazy ballsy bastard decides to come out from his hiding place, I don't want him to head straight for you like a fucking animal." You winked at him and crossed your arms over your chest.

"Sounds like you are describing your dick."

"Don't fucking tempt me." His finger sarcastically pointed at you with a firm mocking expression. He jumped off the truck bed and hunched over with a grunt, he held his back. He straightened himself up and you waved at him with a lighthearted smirk.

"You okay there old man?"

"Fuck you." He snidely replied, you chuckled maniacally as you began to open Ash's bag and search through it for anything to your liking. You found a pair of black leggings that suited you, you rolled them up your legs. They were much bigger than you were use to, then again not that Ash was a heavy woman but she certainly was much bulkier than you.

"Are you fucking done over there?!" You heard a screech and when you looked over your shoulder, Negan had managed to open the gate. Much to his dismay the sound caused two walkers to emerge from their hiding places, Negan wiped them both out with Lucille only bloodying himself further. You walked up to him and his eyes immediately went to the leggings you had picked out. "I take it back. It's weird seeing you in another woman's clothing. Take them off and put my boxers on or something."

"What the fuck, Negan?!" You flung your hands up into the air and stormed past him, out of his reach.

"They look so big on your sweet ass, I can't see the fucking contours of that juicy be~hind."

"Stop looking at my butt you perv." You caught sight of an empty coffee stand and went rushing towards it. Maybe you both could find an over abundance of good food here.

"Buttercup, where are you going? We have to go get back the truck."

"Let's look around first." You were never really an adventurous spirit, more curious really. But the excitement of being in an abandoned theme park was overtaking you. You spotted a shop at bit farther past the ticket booths.

"Take off the leggings and I might consider."

"No..." You whined like an insistent child, skipping back to Negan and grabbing his hand and tugging him along. "There is a gift shop, let's go see."

"You are such a child. If I had known this I would have gotten you a fucking leash."

"Negan, Please. I have never been to a place like this before. Please~" You carried on that single word until Negan snapped interrupting your manners.

"Okay, okay. Fuck. Just for a couple minutes."

"We aren't in a hurry. Come on." He pulled you smack against his chest, crushing you into him.

"I am kind of in a hurry to get you in a bed though..." His lips pressed to the corner of your cheek, then along your jaw, then down your neck. "Make you fucking scream for me, prolong your pleasure till you're fucking melting into a puddle." You shivered, pressing your body further into his. The scent of zombie rot did not block out his whispering husky voice, low and deep and aroused. You teased him, hovering your lips over his, you licked your lips slowly dragging your tongue across the mint flesh. By placing one hand on his chest you pushed away, his hand releasing yours and you stumbled away towards the shop with a grin.

"What a fucking cock tease?" He grumbled as he started after you in the direction of the empty building. What drew you inside was the expanse amount of color, there was no lighting so it was difficult to make out certain things under the dark shade. You could see shirts and bikinis, autograph books, stuffed animals, candy, it was like nothing had been touched. Negan entered through the double doors, his eyes scanned everything with caution as he followed you through the isles of the shop. A large Mickey Mouse plushie caught your eye at the top shelf of various other miniature characters. You giddily went to it, jumping up and down to reach its black foot.

"Fuck woman, it's like you want to fuck this thing." Negan reached over your clammy fingers and grabbed the Mickey Mouse off the shelf. As soon as he brought it to your chest you hugged it as hard as possible. The feeling of soft feather like silk flush against your skin was a good contrast to the scratchy covers you had dealt with these past few days. The idea of dry jumping this thing did not go far from your mind after Negan mentioned it, the plush was so comfy.

"I might just." You mumbled with closed eyes and cheek pressed to the giant sized mouse.

"Wait a second. Are you saying you would hump that fucking thing?" Your eyes slit open and you smiled at him innocently.

"I never said I wouldn't." Negan's jaw fell to the floor as you left him to go busy yourself with another portion of the store.

"That is so hot. That right there tickles my fucking balls, baby." You ignored Negan's declaration, taking notice of the huge display of chocolate bars in the shape of Mickey Mouses. Your Mouse stuffed doll was still held tightly to you, you felt almost protective of it. You began to sort through the different chocolate flavors for each bar: Raspberry, vanilla, mint. Negan stopped alongside you, he grabbed a whole stack of them. He went through each different one until he came down to two bars and shoved them into his jacket.

"I hope we'll have more to eat other then chocolate while we are here."

"Oh I will be eating more than just chocolate regardless buttercup." He said with a careless sway to his voice, as if the statement wasn't sexual enough with just his voice. You sighed at his sexual innuendo and looked around for something else to attend to. There was a whole isle dedicated to hats and wrist bands, your hand snatched at one of the tiaras and you placed it on your head. You turned around to show Negan, he was directly behind you when you turned, being critical with a pair of Mickey gloves. He smiled lovingly down at your fancy display, he brushed a strand of hair from your face with his free hand.

"I told you, you were a princess." You snorted, picking up the Mickey Mouse ears and wiggling them at him tauntingly. He took a giant step back and held up all five to freeze your cruel plot. "If you put that on my head my lady, I will throw you to the fucking peasants." It was more of a playful warning then a serious one, but you could see the anxious glint in his eyes. You took a step forward and he stepped back again.

"Oh come on Negan, don't tell me you are scared of little mouse ears?"

"I'm not, I just don't want them on my fucking head."

"Okay, whatever floats your boat." You shrugged, you knew you would never catch up to him enough to place them on his head, you would have to catch him off guard. You found a large handy bag near you and put the ears in there. You could hear Negan let out a sigh of relief, turning around to search another part of the store. It was so big and the merchandise seemed never ending. You put your Mouse on a shelf with the bag, you knew you couldn't put it on the floor considering it was really dusty and dirty there. You still had to recognize that this place hadn't been managed in a long time.

You went to one of the clothing racks, shuffling through shirt after shirt of Disney product. You found a tank top that seemed very appeasing, loose fitting with a picture of goofy on it. It was a slight teal color, not your favorite, but you figured it could be a good bed time shirt while you were here. You laid it down over the other hanging clothes and lifted the top you were wearing over your head, tossing it next to the Mickey Mouse tank. Suddenly a popping noise echoed across from you and when you looked up, Negan was hitting the other stuffed animals with Lucille. Fluffy bits of cotton flying about in a flurry, like a cloudy tornado.

"Negan?!" He abdruptly stopped, Lucille embedded into the side of Miney's head. He was staring at you with wide eyes, like one of those looks a kid would give you if they were caught. Those chocolate orbs moved down to your chest, nothing but a thin bra to hold your breasts together. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"I thought I was having some fun..." He breathlessly adjusted himself to his full height, blood marred the innocent torn up faces and bodies of the victim stuffed dolls. "But it appears that you are obviously having a party, without me."

"Negan, I was just trying this on."

"Yeah, you mean they," He pointed to your breasts with Lucille. "were trying that on." He came closer, shifting about the hanger of clothes till he came to a smaller size of what you had picked. "I think this should fit, gives those puppies some air."

"Gosh," You ripped the shirt from his hand and tossed it over your shoulder. "Do you ever think about anything other than sex?!" He was trying as hard as he could to hide the amusement on his expression. Instead his arm mockingly wrapped around you, pulling you close so your shoulder was against his chest. He kissed your forehead, you thought the moment was innocent until he caught the edge of your earlobe between his teeth.

"Don't tell me you aren't craving for some more either." Lucille hit the hardwood flooring with a thud, both of Negan's hands encompassing the back and front of your throat. His lips goaded further, mouthing at the sensitive spot behind your ear. Your eyes glided shut and your head flew back with a quiet meow that left your lips. The one gloved hand traveled down the base of your neck to your busty chest, squeezing and toying with the pillowy mounds.

"Negan, can we save this for-" He chuckled lowly, interrupting your words the hand on the back of your neck forced your body to turn into his. His lips ghosted across your own, eyes peering into your flushed soul.

"So fucking hot." He whispered darkly to your burning lips, causing them to cry out with a drunken need. "I want you to hump me like you would that fucking shitty ass Mouse of yours..." You almost died alone at the direct order, your body shivering with delight. "You've been giving him all the fucking attention and I want some too." You hadn't realized his hands swarming your body, moving to cup your   
ass. "Go ahead." He allowed for a slight lift with his knee perched out, you encased it your thighs. Using his muscly leg to hold you up as your hips circled in gyrating motions against his rock hard thigh. "That's it. Just Like that." He encouraged your thrusting with his large hands around your hips, forcing your clit into him with a solid pressure. "Yeah, you are my fucking dirty girl, aren't you?"

"Yes, Negan. Yes." You swallowed, moans drawn from the back of your most primal instincts. You gyrated with more ferocity, the pleasure building to heights as great as towers in a city of sin. You beckoned Negan's forehead to yours, your sight finally matching with his. He groaned between clenched teeth, your knee kept gently brushing against the flooded swell of his erection beneath his jeans. You cried out as an explosion occurred at the deepest bits of your being, Negan seized you as your hips moved of their own accord, fighting to prolong your orgasm. Your hips came to a sluggish halt, your breathless and heaving boss on firm against Negan's jacket. "I am so sorry. I shouldn't have-"

"Shut your pretty little mouth that wasn't meant for me."

"But aren't-" Your chest lifted slightly as you drew in dense amounts of air. "Aren't you hurting?"

"I have been half-fucking hard ever since I woke up with your naked ass on my fucking lap. I can wait just a little longer."

"Just a little." You stood up off of his bent knee, nearly falling over as your legs took control, a soaking spot residing over the skinny fabric.

"Sorry-"

"No more apologizing." He said dismissively as he picked up Lucille and went back over to the shelves of stuffed animals. He was hitting at them for nearly the entire time you both were there. You stayed for about twenty minutes, filling the bag you had picked out with more Chocolate bars, clothing, and a couple things of jewelry you had found that was neutral for a Disney shop. Negan had completely eaten the two chocolate bars he had shoved into his jacket, complaining that their wasn't anymore Dark Chocolate left on the shelf, but really he had shoved the remaining six bars into his jacket also.  
  
The both of you walked back to the truck, your Mickey Mouse held under one armpit. Negan had been polite enough to offer carrying the rest of the shoppe delight you had picked up. He entered the Driver's side, handing you the bag. You tossed the Mickey Mouse into the back and placed the bag between your legs. Then would be the perfect time. Negan was focused on the path ahead, driving the truck forward and maneuvering it through the park. He was going towards the castle, passing the surprisingly polished Statue of both Mickey and Walt Disney. The hedges and flowers were a bit doll from years of lacking attention, but it felt just as special to you. Especially after this. You reached into the bag and as he started to slow down on the bridge under the castle-

Snap!

Negan slammed his foot on the break and the truck came to a screeching stop. In a very slacking manner his head tilted to the side, his jaw fastened and he was glaring at you with utter indignation. Your upturned lips were covered by the swift movement of your hand. Your face turned bright red as you contained the laughter building up in you as best as you could.

The ears plucked out from the sides of his finely slicked back hair, the black strips overlapping his stubbled sideburns. Your hand overflowed with air and burst from your mouth, along with the intense laughter that came flowing from your lips and boisterously running through the space of the front seat.

"Oh Fuck Negan, you look just like fucking Mickey Mouse."

"Ha. Ha. Ha." His fake laughter sounded infuriated, penetrating your own as your stomach clenched and your body shook.

But slowly, gradually, not too quickly, did Negan's lips started to turn up and his hand slapped down on your knee causing you to ball out more uncontrollable chuckles.

"I fucking love you, Buttercup. Did you know that?." Your laughter died down with sighs and hiccups, a smile still full on your face.

"I fucking love you too, Negan."


	14. Day Nine Continued: Suite

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan finds what he is looking for and he isn't done with you yet.

  
You both had found the suite that Negan was so intent on staying in. While he struggled to find that room, you constantly had to remind him that you could just stay in a different hotel. One of the ones closest to the park, but he didn't want that, Negan wanted the castle. Negan wanted you to be treated like a princess and despite the condition of the hallways leading up to the room, the room was as tidy as it would be if there was room service. With the exception of dust and an absence of light, followed by little critters scampering across the floor: rats and cockroaches, not your favorite at all.  
The room was locked, Negan beat it down with Lucille until the door burst open. It was a mess of violent grunting and groaning, along with thumps and smashes, meanwhile you had been to the side telling him that it wasn't that big of a deal. But he wanted this suite and you were extremely happy for his determination because it was luxury. The suite was covered in hard wood flooring, beige walls and it opened up into a huge living room. There was a mid wall that split two separate rooms; one leading into what appeared to be a room for children, the other a room for the adults. Branching off to the left of the entrance was another hallway that lead down into several other rooms. The living room had a fire place with dry wood and above it on the wall was a flat screen tv that you figured didn't work. There was a set of two royal red sofas lined with gold designs and emblems attributes to Cinderella. There was a dark oak coffee table on top of a fur red rug.

"Mmmm, mmm, mmm. I think I really like me these accommodations." He waltzed over to the window and swung open the curtains, a bleeding light came gliding into the room and barely breaking the top of your shoes. "Let's go see the bedroom and the en suite. Ohhh I can't wait for the en suite." He propped Lucille up against the window seal, and rubbed his hands together stooping low towards the bedroom on his left.

"Negan, what if there isn't even running water? I really have to go pee."

"Well then you can squat somewhere."

"Negan." Your call came out as a warning and he spun around to immediately attend to you.

"If it isn't working, I will figure something out okay. Besides it's fucking Disney, they have plan B's for their Plan A's and C's. Why does that matter? I thought we were having fun. Huh?"

"We are..." You hugged Mickey Mouse tighter. "I just want to make sure that you are comfortable with this is all. You don't have to do it for me."

"I am not. I am doing this for us." He stepped closer and wrapped an arm around you. "Let's go see if the shower is working. Our first priority is bath time."

"More like your first priority, Mr. Grinch." You pinched your nose with a giggle as he scooted you along in the opposite direction of the bedroom, to the hall that seemed to lead to the en suite. The bathroom was exquisite, the tiles were a little grimy, but the bathtub was huge and on the side was a shower with two shower heads, along with two sinks and the mirror was spotless. The only minor implication was that neither of you could see things very well, Negan left the door open to at least shed some light. But all you could see was shadows and the shiny edges of bath ware.

"Well hello there." Negan exclaimed, he pushed past you over to the sinks and turned one of the knobs. Water spilled from the faucet and Negan fisted the air in excitement. "Shower sex, fuck yes!" You were a bit more worried about getting to a toilet, which was on the other side of a tile wall. You dropped your Mickey beside the sink Negan was at and went straight for it. Negan was busy fixing himself up in the mirror. "Hey start to undress we are taking a shower now."

"Wait, what?" Your voice echoed from your place on the toilet, the walls caving in around you and amplifying your voice.

"We are taking a shower now." You could hear the sound of shuffled clothing and knew that he was undressing. You had no choice, but to shower with him. You saw his black leather jacket jump over the tile wall and flatten at your feet.

"Negan, can I fucking go pee in peace?"

"You have peed and pood with me in the same fucking room many times. Hurry up so I can fuck you." The shower began to ran, a weird clogging noise sounded before a steady stream of water announced itself.

"Oh Negan, you are going to be the death of me." You relieved yourself, peeling the leggings off with your shirt and your bra. You wiped yourself down and stood up, grabbing Negan's jacket and hanging it over the tile wall. You started picking up his discarded clothing and placing it on the sink.

"Can you hurry up, little Negan is getting really impatient here?"

"One second!"

"The place is kind of dirty anyways, just let it be and cum under this smooth waterfall with me princess." You couldn't hide the blush on your cheeks and as you looked up into the mirror, Negan was leaning against the frame of the shower with a grin on his face that you could make out by his white sharp teeth in the shady dark.

"Very Charming."

"Oh Yes, your fucking King is waiting." He held his arms up, his biceps bulging, muscles teasing you to no end and curling tattoos. You patted your clothes down onto the counter, turning on your heel to stalk over to him. You bit your lips as you walked into Negan's arms, your hands smoothed over his broad chest of tattoos and old scars.

"This is the body of a brutal warrior, not a king." His arms grappled her unexpectedly into the water, he held her vice against his wet chest. The water soaked them both, mud and blood mixing with it and floating down into the  
drain.

"Can't a man be both?" He said in reply to your wild comment, your finger tip mimicked the bumps of his muscle, moving smoothly along the curves.

"Mmmm, I don't know. The difference between a brutal warrior and a king is that one takes his time and the other does not." He barricaded you against the wall underneath the beating water, it was a little on the chilly side but soothing none the less. Hitting your skin and calming you, Negan relaxing under the massage that the spray gave him.

"Which would you rather prefer princess?"

"Well, I like them both. I have seen them both." His body bent down and his nose moved along the inside of her own, rippling water pouring down the tips of them.

"So what do you like more?" Your paws intimately stroked his sturdy chest, till just your fingers could snake around his neck. You raised yourself up on your tippy toes and licked at his lips.

"Surprise me?" You whispered it so lowly that he probably couldn't even hear it, but you mouthed it across the great sea that led to his lips. He was slow this time, much slower than before, much more tentative and purposeful with his motions. Both hands trimmed your shoulders till they were bound with your palms, you yelped as he slammed them instantaneously into the textile. Water ran down your bodies, allowing the both of you to feel its sensual touches. Neither of you could see very well as it was, instead using the sense of touch to guide each other into pure bliss. He was binding your wrists to the wall, his hard manhood firm and demanding between your legs.

"How about I prove to you that I can be two at the same time?" He rubbed his stubble along your cheeks, across your neck and back up again. You were pleading at this point, begging him to stick you with his cock. "I can mark you and I can fucking claim you all in one sitting and you will be the one to fucking take it like a good little girl." One hand went under your bottom and you were lifted up as if you were paper. His lips nibbling and suckling at yours with passion and fury combined. He was being the animal that were to take you in the middle of the forest, haul you to the ground and fuck you endlessly. He was the polite man that patiently waited, but greedy, drawing your sounds from you like an artist at great work, patient. His hand working between your legs from under you, holding you up to the sky and praising you like the princess that he considered you to be.

"Negan, please I can't take anymore." You were whimpering and moaning, you had been the entire time, letting out gasps and whining for more. Negan wanted to hear you scream for him, so his other hand left your wrist and you were spun around and shoved into the wall. Animal like. But he outlined the dip in your back, adventurous and loving, till his hands slapped down on both cheeks. Your back arched further and you mewed your approval with desperate cries. "Negan, Please." He wasted no time sticking himself in you. Animal like. His pounding was as violent as the warrior you had claimed him to be, but his draw from your beautiful tightness was everlasting and precise. Your fists flattened against the wall and you moaned, your bottom pressing into Negan's pelvis as he moved so languidly against you. "Yes... Don't stop. I am going to cum." He stopped completely and you felt the burn between your legs pulsate.

"No. You are not going to cum until I say you can." You had never done this before, you weren't really sure if you could hold yourself that long. Your first time having sex in years was yesterday and not even then were you able to refrain from having two orgasms within five minutes.

"Negan, w-what if I can't?"

"You will because if you don't, then I will have to give you a nice fucking spanking. A real nice one."

"Oh fuck..." His cock plummeting into the depths of you, your walls tightening around him. You closed your eyes and focused on him, trying your best to hold the orgasm begging to erupt from your body. "Negan, please let me cum, baby. Please."

"A little bit longer." His voice was throaty and demanding, his arm barred around your waist and you were smothered with pleasure. His hand went coursing around the curves of your body, reaching your clit and running just so.

"Negan!"

"Cum right the fuck now, right on my cock." You didn't hesitate to submit, your body tensed as his seed and warmth emptied into you. The feeling was sensational, his hand prolonging the orgasm curling your stomach and forcing your hand. "Oh baby, doll..." That single orgasm spent you and you stood up only to collapse backwards into Negan, under the water fully. "You are so perfect." You pushed against him and spun on your heel to bury your face into his chest.

"I'm tired." His chin rested on your head, the tips of his finger shifted over your shoulder and lower back. The water beating down on you made you sleepier and your eyelids grew heavy.

"Here," He cleared his throat, his body tugging from yours and he opened the glass sliding door. "Let me go get you a towel princess and some clothes. I will carry you back to the bed."

"Okay." You leaned against the tile wall as Negan disappeared into the light darkness that was the bathroom. He left the room from your sight and you began to scrub yourself, wiping the juices from between your legs and the sweat that had managed to stay on your figure. A couple minutes passed by and you wondered when Negan would get back, you turned off the shower and left the bathroom. Patting your way through the unkempt Suite, you found yourself walking towards the bedroom, puddles of water following you there. Exhaustion taking over you, you shut the curtains in the living room to conceal the beaming light that was blinding your eyes. The bedroom door wide open and you went in, it was just as dark as the other rooms. However, there was no hiding the shadowy man on the bed nor the hard snores exiting his nostrils.

You disregarded your damp hair and dripping wet vessel to lay down alongside him. Your skin brushed up against his taut bicep, which wrapped around you unconsciously and pulled you into his nude body. You steadied yourself against him, arms hugging him as he drew you closer. The snoring stopped and you could feel his nostrils plummet into your hair.

"Sorry buttercup." His voice groggy and sloth like, with his other hand he lifted the covers over the both of you. The bed was comfortable, it was beyond that and the pillows were bulky but soft.

"It's okay, you were up all night. You need some sleep."

"I'm so hungry."

"We just had sex, wh-" His sleepy laughter filled your ears, his lips having been directly beside one of them. You could fee his prickly stubble collect along the side of your neck and scratch your skin.

"You have a dirty little mind, don't you? I mean food baby."

"Let's go get some then." You didn't even want to bother yourself with the idea that you were already thinking like him. Dirty and inappropriate. Just feeling his flaccid cock against your thigh was tantalizing.

"No. Get some rest, we will go looking first thing in the morning." You made a noise of agreement, cuddling further into him, a few minutes passed by and you had began dozing off.

"You know what I just realized?" You licked your lips, eyes closed and body limp to his side.

"Wha..."

"You don't need that stupid Mouse, you have me." He sounded so smug as he said it, you would have bet that if the light was on you could see the wolffish grin of a very satisfied man.

"Oh shut up...."


	15. Day Ten: Primal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Negan and you explore the park for food and electricity, suspicion causes you to have doubts about how truly save it is in Disney World.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am sorry everyone, I have been going through some tough times and I have found it difficult recently to find new and fresh ideas that would fit with this story. However, since the beginning of my writer's block I have been typing up stories that do not coincide with this one and have put them into a single story called 'Welcome to the New World'. They are mostly just random ideas that I have come up with to help me get more motivated for this story. If you want to read that until I actually start updating this story as much as I was before, by all means it is at your disposal. As for this chapter, I don't know how confident I feel about it. I am having trouble putting things into words at the moment, even though I already know which direction I want these two to go in. I'm hoping this is okay for the meantime.

 

  You were awoken by a tapping noise, it was consistent and repetitive, like footsteps. You sat there for a whole minute, waiting to see if something would happen so you could pinpoint what it was, or where it was coming from. It didn't stop, remaining as annoying as it had been when you first woke up. You placed a hand on Negan's shoulder and lightly shook him, hoping he would hear the sound too.

 

"Negan?" You whispered, wondering if perhaps you were just going crazy and the clicking was how insanity took over your brain, one click at a time. However, the click paused and a loud bang occurred, your body flinched closer into Negan's causing him to jolt into consciousness.

 

"Jesus fuck doll, what is wrong with you?" His groggy voice split the room's silence, his hand slapping down on your waist with a resounding snap and you winced.

 

"Don't you hear that?" You hissed back, but it was too late: the noise had stopped to your dismay. Negan rolled over and away from you, this wasn't the first time something like this had happened. Negan was a man who liked his sleep and he didn't care, even if the world was about to explode, he wouldn't get up unless he really wanted too. Whenever you would sleep over in his room for the night you would almost always end up waking him for the most mundane reasons, he would curse at you and turn away like it didn't matter. However, on more than one occasion you could admit that he would feel guilty about those few times he'd ignore you in favor of some more shut eye. You had done the same a couple times yourself.

 

"Negan please, I think something is in the other room."

 

"Go the fuck back to sleep."

 

Thump!

 

 A shuffling noise and Negan was sitting up on his elbows looking towards the door with harried sleepiness. You sat up with him, wrapping your arms around his shoulders and hanging along his back for protection.

 

"I told you." 

 

"Where's Lucille?" He was squinting around the room, looking for his prized weapon.

 

"The other room, Negan." He plopped back down into the bed, the noise was persistent and despite the door being slightly cracked, you couldn't see anything.

 

"Ugh... Let's get some more shut eye, we will worry about it later." He shuffled over to your side, wrapping an arm under your breasts.

 

"What if it's a corpse, Negan?" He placed his head on your shoulder with a grunt of disapproval.

 

"Can't be, unless they could hear your fucking screaming from earlier I think we are fine." His lips pressed to your skin, moving up towards your neck where they latched onto you and suckled.

 

"Negan, please let's go see what it is." He popped up from the bed and patted over towards the door.

 

"It's nothing, okay?" He swung the door open and in walked a walker from the other side, he jumped back with wide eyes. "Holy shit!" The thing nearly tackled him, you yanked the covers off of you and, in a desperate attempt to defend Negan, tripped onto the floor. You went dizzy for a moment as your brain rattled around in your head, you had to be careful after that concussion. You sat up and stood to your full height, just then Negan slammed Lucille against its forehead. Blood spattered around the room, sprinkling in your direction, droplets sprayed over your body, creating a massacre of Negan's own design. You breathlessly gazed down over your painted skin, the vessel of the walker falling to the ground with a loud thwack.

 

"N-Negan..." His chest was heaving, bloody beads across the side of his cheek. His eyes were ravenous as they followed along the contours of your own crimson and nude self. 

 

"You okay?"

 

"Yeah..." You paused at the look in his eyes. "Are you?"

 

"Fuck yeah." He was glaring at your breasts with those wide chasms, he looked as hungry as a starved dog. "That turned me the fuck on."

 

"Wait, Ne-" He dropped Lucille to the floor and came to you, lifting you up into his arms and throwing you down on the bed. He attacked you, going down on you until you writhed and screamed for more. His cock penetrated you within seconds after your first orgasm, your pleas for him floating around the room. The entire ordeal felt like it had only passed by in minutes, but in actuality lasted for about a half an hour of him brutally fucking you into the bed post. Negan's stamina was insane, he fucked you nonstop until you had came spiraling into an orgasm and then he would let you rest for not even half a minute before going at it again. The idea that it had all been because of some walker-fied bloodlust was so hot to you. You had ultimately came six times because of Negan's ministrations. When he finished you both laid there breathlessly, staring up at the ceiling. The stench of rotten flesh finally becoming a nuisance in the once secure room, but the stink of sex was also a permeating scent. Neither of you moved for a long time, merely breathing heavily and trying to make out what had occurred. Until...

 

"Well fuck doll, that was the fucking best."

 

"You can say that again." You chimed back, he smirked and his arm came around you. Sweaty, red, and slimy skin melting into one another until the both of you were stationary, your legs wrapped around him and the everlasting glow of the orgasmic high raining down on you.

 

"Want to go get something to eat?" He asked randomly, not once looking over at you. Without another word said the both of you got up, a mutual understanding that hunger was not something to be ignored anymore. You both took a quick rinse in the shower, getting dressed in what attire you could strip from the suitcases. This time Negan allowed you to wear his boxers as a substitute for shorts. The shirt that you picked from Ash's bag was slightly bigger due to your breasts being smaller and the color was a lingering green that you never would have caught in your own wardrobe. It hung down over your chest like a night gown, but in length was sufficient enough. You tucked the sleeves up so that the shirt appeared like a cut off, they were long and agonizingly annoying. As for Negan, it seemed like he always wore the same thing; he forewent the leather jacket surprisingly and was back down to a pair of jeans and white Hanes t-shirt. 

   

The both of you ventured from the castle at a little after mid-day, walking down the vintage shops and restaurants that made up main street. Negan gave you a long spiel about how you were lucky to have not seen Disney at its busiest. You noted his description; fat people, nagging tourists, and shitty kids. It kind of amused you, how he might have looked at it a different way before the apocalypse and how he looked at it after.

 

"We really need to start scavenging the restaurants though, I am starving." You held a hand over your stomach as the both of you passed a couple more shops that displayed sweets and toys.

 

"Alright, alright. I have just the place."

 

"Negan, why go to a specif-" His back was turned to you as he sped off down the street in long strides. "Negan!" You shouted as you ran out after to him, trying to jog at the same fast pace as him but you ended up walking within a five feet distance. 

 

"There is this Lousiana place."

 

"Cajun food is very perishable."

 

"A lot of food is babe, thanks for the obvious." You scoffed, slumping forward as the two of you approached one of the corner shops. A bridge branched out in that direction, exiting into the bigger regions of the park. "They had this really nice battered dish that tasted so fucking good."

 

"Who knows if they might even have this restaurant anymore?"

 

"Oh yeah buttercup, it's not like no one has fucking been here for four years. They definitely did some renovating." He replied sarcastically with a somewhat jovial undertone, swinging Lucille around carelessly and enjoying the landscape. 

 

"Look! It's Peter Pan!" You gushed as you finally managed to come up alongside Negan, catching sight of Peter Pan's attraction. It made you think about your childhood, you wished you could have had memories here. All you could say was that you had seen the movies.

 

"Maybe we can catch a couple of rides."

 

"Someone's going to have to monitor them Negan, I don't think that's safe." 

 

"Don't be a fun-shitter-oner, we'll get some food and go have some fun. Besides whose going to fucking monitor the ride, we are the only ones here."

 

"That's what I'm saying, urgh Negan!" Your hands clenched into fists at your sides and you stomped off in front of him.

 

"What's your fucking problem?" You swing around and point a finger at him, right in his pretty-ugly face, stopping the two of you completely.

 

"What the fuck is your problem?"

 

"Babe, I am not in the mood for this."

 

"I'm hungry, Negan!" You blurted out, your voice echoed into the emptiness of the park and the both of you paused to look around. Negan's hand tightened on his bat as he waited for any possible walker's to reveal themselves. His eyes narrowed on you again, you crossed your arms and sighed.

 

"Whoever put the stick up your ass babe, needs to fuck off. Do you understand?"

 

"Negan-"

 

"I'm trying to have fun with you here, haven't we been doing that?"

 

"Yeah." You looked down, Negan grabbed your chin to lift your gaze and caress your bottom lip. 

 

"Let's have some more then. I am sure we can find a place around here somewhere, but first we need to get the power."

 

"Why didn't you tell me that was where we were going?! You didn't have to use a stupid restaurant to get my attention."

 

"I know how you get when you are hungry..." He teased, he just loved to tease. You rolled your eyes, tucking your fists at your side, you stomped on.

 

Negan and you moved through the park with ease, catching a glimpse of the scenery that the park had spread out. Negan didn't seem like he knew where he was going, although he had stopped many times to look around, it appeared that he was lost. Trying to find the power generator for an entire park was a lot harder than he made it out to be and trying to find a _specific_ restaurant was even worse, no matter if he was serious about it or not.

 

"Negan, maybe we should get a map. We don't even know if the generator is in the park."

 

"I promise you it is, I know Disney world okay? Let me do the navigating." Your stomach let out another agony filled growl, you clenched a hand over it and groaned. The both of you had been walking around for hours and still no food.

 

"Maybe we should worry about priorities, i'm completely fine without electricity." 

 

"Well I'm not." Your head hung low and you sighed, Negan still treading along stubbornly.

 

"Hey," You called as you were lagging behind, he slowed down for you to catch up and you grabbed his arm. "I'm really hungry." The third time that you had said it and you could visibly see the annoyance and worry on Negan's expression. 

 

"I told you, we will find something."

 

"We've passed like seven restaurants. Please, let's stop somewhere." You flickered your eyes at him and his jaw tightened in deep thought.

 

"Alright, pick somewhere." You jumped up and down in excitement, having been prepared for either answer he would have given.

 

"Thank you, thank you, thank you." You pecked Negan's cheek before sprinting in the direction of a pizza shop you had been eyeing. You disappeared into the shop, Negan following lazily behind you in long strides. He stomped into the desolate place, it was more dark and dreary than the gift shop they had stormed the day before. With Lucille on his shoulder he curiously glanced around at the vintage dusty tables, empty bar stools and peeling wallpaper. You had found yourself on the bar top, pulling up bottle after bottle of alcohol from the other side of the counter. 

 

"Liquor~" You gushed playfully, prancing over to Negan with a bottle of vodka in either hand. 

 

"Well darling, you know what happens when I drink." He narrowed his eyes on you, you smiled softly and your wrists hung down at your sides with the bottles. 

 

"What happens, Mr. Know it all?"

 

"I fuck, that's what happens."  A sly grin overtook his features, you rolled your eyes and spun away. You should have expected an answer like that.

 

"Yeah, sure. Mr. Know it all." You hopped over the counter and began sifting through the rest of the bottles, your stomach let out another loud growl. You clenched a hand over your stomach and met Negan's questioning gaze.

 

"I'm hungry too." He vaulted over the bar top and entered into the double doors that were the kitchen. "Lets go find some chow."

 

"Not like I haven't been saying that this entire time, asshole." You teased, feet shuffling along behind Negan. 

 

"Don't smart mouth me." The kitchen was rusty and compared to the rest of Disney, certainly fit the shoe for what an apocalyptic shut down would entail. There were discarded pots and pans everywhere, unattended to and neglected. Dust had settled on the counter tops and without electricity an eerie feel surrounded the kitchen. "How does pasta sound?"

 

"We don't even know if they have pasta."

 

"Lets see..." Negan opened a door leading into what he assumed was a pantry, the odd thing was it was an empty pantry. There were a few rotten fruits sitting around and fungus covered potatoes, but nothing significant for food. "Well that is weird."

 

"Maybe-"

 

Clink! 

 

Both Negan and you spun around, Negan jumped out in front of you extending Lucille into the darkness. 

 

"Who is there?"

 

"Fuck, this place is haunted, Negan."

 

"Shut up." His eyes narrowed on the empty black, you held Negan's arm tightly. You didn't have any weapons, the only thing you both had was Lucille. "I asked, who. Is. There?" No reply. Negan weaved his fingers through yours and began guiding you back out of the restaurant. Once the two of you were in the open sunlight it felt better, Negan still wouldn't let go of your hand so you let him hold you. It must have comforted him to know that you were in his grasp, safe in his eyes.

 

"It could have been a rat." He sighed and reluctantly released your hand.

 

"Stay close, okay baby doll? We will go find another restaurant."

 

"Okay." Seeing the caution on Negan's expression sent fear into your heart, you thought back to Peter and Andy and what they had done to you. You had worked so hard to overcome that, you couldn't live with being taken again and abused. You knew what Negan was thinking, he was thinking that there were others here. That would have explained the lack of food in the pantry and perhaps the fallen pot. You tried not to think too far into it and instead bundled yourself closer to Negan and held his arm.

 

The Walking continued, the sun coming that much further to its descent by the hour. You imagined what this vacation might have been like had Amber never snuck onto the bus. You weren't even sure how she had managed to do it. Negan hadn't talked to you since the incident at the restaurant and the silence was starting to embed itself into you.

 

"Negan?"

 

"What?" That simple utterance was low and strict, you recognized that he was still on guard. 

 

"Let's talk about stuff."

 

"Like what?" You sighed and shrugged, your finger gently squeezing his arm.

 

"I don't know, I just want to talk." 

 

"Okay..." He cleared his throat, then forced a grin over his shoulder at you. "Why didn't your parents ever take you to Disney world?" He must have been prepared to ask that quetion, you assumed it was a question he had pinned into his brain for quite a while.

 

"You already know why?" You chuckled dismissively, your head plopped down onto Negan's shoulder.

 

"No, I want the real reason." Slowly your smile faded into a frown, how could he have read so far into you like that? "You never talk about your family." True. You only ever mention them rarely, Negan had already told you about his abusive father and his whore of a mother, but you had never told him everything.

 

"Because that was in the past." You might have sounded a bit more aggravated in your response than you intended. Negan was giving you a side glance that was both questioning and tender. "Okay, I will tell you." You didn't want to remember what the life was like, the apocalypse was both the worst and best thing to have ever happened to you. "It wasn't because of money and it wasn't because of school."

 

"I know that by now."

 

"My mother was an angel, she worked at home. My father on the other hand... he hated me after Kevin died."

 

"Asshole." Negan muttered under his breath and you smiled, until you remembered what you were supposed to be talking about.

 

"Yeah, he was an asshole. He wanted a general for a son, not a princess. So he did everything he could to make me a guy, rejected anybody that had tried to be my friend and put me into sports of all kinds. It became too much, one B in my grade book gave me chores and beatings for a whole week."

 

"Shit... what did your mother do?"

 

"Nothing, my father was a powerful man. I told him I was going to kill myself once, didn't even bat an eye." Negan's jaw tightened, his eyes swung ahead of him. "I found my independence and decided to go to college, my parents died in a car accident before I graduated."

 

"That's a pretty shitty home."

 

"Your childhood was just as bad if you ask me, maybe even worse. At least my parents held up the facade of parenting, yours didn't care, I couldn't imagine where I would be if mine didn't."

 

"Facade?"

 

"Well..." You licked your lips to combat the aridness that had suddenly shriveled them up. "My father..." A bad taste overtook your mouth. "I knew he hated me, but he still gave me things and took care of me. He was a rich guy, whenever I needed something he wouldn't hesitate. I could never complain about the way he treated me entirely, not matter how much he punished me for the littlest things, not matter how much he ignored my feelings, he still gave me what I needed in life. I couldn't resent that, I still can't do to this day. So I figure it was just a facade, to keep face in front of his peers, in front of the neighbors and the teachers. A lot of kids wanted to be me, when I wanted to be everyone else." But there was that one time? How could you forget? The only time you had ever felt remotely close to your father. You became subdued by the elements of your past and couldn't keep from speaking up. "My mother she loved me, I knew that much, but she comforted me in private only and that was about it."

 

"That's bullshit, sweetheart. No man should treat his daughter like that and what mother should conceal her own affections for her child? It's sick is what it is." Not that his childhood wasn't any better, he had mentioned once or twice about how horrible his parents were. 

 

"Well there was one time, one time that I felt like my father actually saw me for who I was, actually paid attention to all that I had done."

 

"What did he do?" You were silent, silent as ever because it really was heartbreaking when you remembered that day. That day all those years ago, the day that reminded you of what it could have been like. "You don't have to tell me, I'm just curious. You've told me enough."

 

"It was my graduation, he actually showed up. There was no party or anything, we went home and then... Dad gave me a gift. It was as if he knew he was going to die only a couple weeks later."

 

"What did he give you?"

 

"A dog."

 

"A dog?" You can hear the confusion in Negan's voice, as if that was the last thing he was expecting you to say. He was probably thinking some family heirloom or some humongous sum of money.

 

"You might think it was stupid."

 

"It fucking was, after everything he had done to you and then he fucking gives you a dog."  You smiled to yourself, recalling that exact day. A dog meant more to you than the world.

 

"I asked for a dog after what happened with Kevin, my father immediately declined. I asked because he never allowed me to have any friends after that anf losing Kevin took a toll on me, when I graduated I still had no friends. He gave me a dog so that I would have something." Realization dawned on Negan, that dog was her father's way of letting you go and allowing you to leave. It was both sick and beautiful at the same time. "I hugged my father for the first time in my entire life that night. I will never forget it."

 

"That was your dog, Tiki, wasn't it?"

 

"You bet. The only company I ever had." He sighed in response, his hand crawled up grab yours and you both continued walking along the park. Still had yet to find a restaurant. "Negan?" At that point you didn't care anymore if you found food, you were beyond starving and knew that Negan wasn't going stop until he found the generators after what happened only a couple hours ago.

 

"Yeah?"

 

"I love you." Negan stopped in his footing and turned to you, his hand still in yours.

 

"Fuck do I love you too." He pulled you into his body with one arm, flush against his chest and he kissed you hard. You smiled against his lips, returning the contact of his tongue with equal ferocity. Negan's aroma invaded your sense of smell, you moaned at him... all of him. Then suddenly, an entirely different scent replaced his. It was a stronger scent that put you on edge, you pulled away from Negan looking into his eyes and seeing if he could smell it too. His head jerked around and your stomach growled...

 

"Food!" You went to run in the general direction of sweet and powerful smell, Negan stopped you immediately.

 

"That means people doll." This put you on pause and you glanced over your shoulder at him. He looked stoic and pensive, like he was trying to deduce what to do. "Let's not risk it."

 

"But Negan, please~ I am starving and maybe they aren't terrible." Maybe they are? Weren't you just worried about ending up with people like Andy and Peter again? You didn't feel so hungry anymore at the thought, but the look on Negan's face read something completely different.

 

"Lets go check out the area from afar and if we don't like what we see, head back."

 

"You sure?"

 

"When have I ever not been?" Um... A lot of the time?


End file.
